InSights

pit bulls & entrepreneurs:identity: conversations about it.

2011-08-15T10:56:00.004+08:00

Identity: the distinguishing but consistent character or personality of an individual in constantly changing circumstances.

Identity is a mental model of one’s self. It relates to an individual’s self image, self esteem, and uniqueness. It contributes to how that individual views one’s self as a person and how he or she stands in relation to others around him. The more assured and accepting a person is of one’s own self image, the more peaceful and stable one’s behavior and performance are in all aspects of life.

Actions:

The pit bull’s not-so-attractive appearance may induce hysteria. Yet it actually translates to practicality and economy. A pit bull requires minimal grooming and maintenance. Its nature and eating habits are simple and predictable. It has no fancy needs and doesn’t demand much attention like labradors, pomeranians, or poodles do. It is also reputed to be very hardworking and frugal, and it knows its position and purpose in life.

Just by being simple, rugged, and consistent, the pit bull can be very comforting company. His earthy nature lends an air of comfort and support to others around him and even provides a sense of therapy to those who need healing.

A few years ago, Cody, a pit bull puppy, was picked by members of the Even Chance Pit Bull Advocacy of San Diego when he was seen limping around an abandoned shelter. At the rescue veterinarian’s office, his chances didn’t look too good when he was diagnosed with a congenital deformity called ectrodactyly or “lobster claw.” Kind donors, through Even Chance, paid to have an orthopedic surgeon correct Cody’s paw. His two split toes were fused together with the surrounding skin, transforming his “lobster claw” to a “mitten.”

Cody was undergoing water therapy when his nature was discovered to be earthy, simple, and very loving. It was as if his past and pain had softened him rather than traumatize him. Soon, he was adopted by Barbara Sullier, a parent of one of the interns at the clinic.

Barbara described Cody as “a sweet, little, loving boy with a charisma that pulls people over to talk to him. He loves all people and wants to make them happy.” Cody still continued to limp due to missing bones and muscles in his right foreleg, but that hardly affected his style.

His personality and traits soon led him to be trained and certified, at age one, as a therapy dog by the Los Angeles based New Leash on Life’s “Lend a Paw” program. During wheelchair tests, Cody would reach up gently and kiss people with disabilities. Children with physical disabilities would easily relate to him and get their spirits boosted by his consistent kindness and even nature.

Through all prejudices and hardships against him, Cody never lost sight of his own, true image. He knew exactly who he was and what his purpose in life was.

Source: Hollow, M. “Pit Bull Stories” July 12, 2010. (http://petnewsandviews.com/2010/07/pit-bull-stories/)

Conversations:

The value of a clear self identity lies in the fact that once you know, understand, and accept who you are; it becomes easy to distinguish between what you want and what you need in life. With an enhanced self perspective, our goals acquire a precise image and definition. Our purpose in work and life becomes crystal clear.

Most of us spend large portions of our lives trying to figure out what it is that we want, what life and career paths to choose. Having a correct self image ensures a clear set of personal objectives. It allows us to invest our energies in the right places and at the right time. Our internal and external resources fall in place, start complementing each other, and empower us to achieve fruitful and effective results.

What can we learn from Cody and Mike? How can we be clear about our identity, and consequently, our goals?

• Know yourself. And in getting to know yourself, refrain from letting your ego and a false sense of who you are influence your choices and decisions in life and business. Knowing, understanding, and accepting yourself as you are needs a powerful combination of humility, awareness, and personal strength.

• Practice being completely at ease with yourself, your background, and your culture. Honestly and objectively recognize and then appreciate your strengths. No two people in the world have exactly the same genetic structure, breeding, and experiences. If our backgrounds differ, naturally, our actions and results should also be different. Refrain from being unduly impressed by the shape, size, and the sizzle of the successes of others around you.

• Consolidate and direct all your energies and all your entrepreneurial efforts in the direction of your true choice at a steady and a consistent pace. Erik H. Erikson, in his book Identity and the Life Cycle (1995), claims that a clear sense of identity provides one with the alacrity and ability to experience one’s self, to have consistency and continuity, and to act according to one’s calling.

• Grow gradually. Being successful as an entrepreneur will take a lot of effort and sacrifice. Leap for growth and greater heights only after you have reached the easily scalable ones at a steady pace. My grandfather, who was born just before the Great Depression, had failed and succeeded at many businesses in his lifetime. In his seventies, in India, he had become well off, stable, and happy with his life. He used to say, “In business and in life, one shouldn’t make any sudden and sharp u-turns.”

• Clarify your values. All clear choices, creative strategies, and conscientious efforts are bound to bring success and glory. Ironically, continuous success might derail our progress if we fall to the temptation of recklessness. As your horizons expand, you may change strategies and tactics but must continue to lean on core values which, originally, made you “YOU!”

Authentic Impact

2011-08-05T11:06:00.012+08:00

In the usual rush of our youths we do not, many a times, give much thought to the subtle, the soft and the subjective elements of our people to people interactions. That is to say we do not much consciously give attention to these elements but at a subconscious level the impact of these interactions get imprinted and stay embedded until, much later, our conscious mind, as we mature and grow, starts to pay its respects to the power of the unconscious mind

One such interaction particularly remained embedded in my mind, until recent years when I uploaded the files and viewed them from a much experienced, and much matured a perspective as concerns people to people interactions.

In high school we had all kinds of teachers. Some were big, some were small, some slow and others fast and fun. Here, I don’t mean to disrespect teachers and the noble profession of teaching, considering that I am a teacher of sorts myself, but only want to make a point that we are all different, and we have different speeds and approaches towards life. In the language of Neuro Linguistic Programming we have different internal clocks, time-lines and different programs.

One of our teachers--let’s skip his name lest some readers do some detective work and pass this article on to him. Also, taking note of my own greying hair, chances are he may have moved on to a better place in life. Yet, you never know, someone might still pass on this newsletter to the next of his kin. This teacher worked, taught and managed his classrooms much too differently and carefully compared to others. Let’s name this teacher “Easy.”

One day, Easy’s class full of young, teenage boys had gotten out of hand and were being really naughty. They were screaming, shouting, shooting paper aeroplanes, breaking chairs and being boys just like boys are supposed to be, wild and unmanageable. Easy, as usual, was having a hard time getting a handle on this crowd. He shouted, he screamed, he banged his wooden walking stick on the table but to no avail. He threatened suspension for the whole class but the chaos and cacophony just wouldn’t subside. The class room had turned into a regular fish market.

Hearing the noise, another teacher, D.N. Irani, walked in from a neighbouring classroom and stood by and next to Easy. Teacher D.N. Irani was tall, lean, had a firm jaw, a high forehead with a closely cropped head of thick, salt and pepper hair. By the side of Easy, Teacher D.N.Irani just stood there, ever so quietly, right up and in front of the class. He said nothing, moved not bit, gestured nothing but stood there tall, quiet, simple and solemn. All he did was peer right into midst of the ruckus the boys were creating and one by one, through each one of the boys’ eyes, he peered down into their hearts, steadily and peacefully.

Very slowly and very surely the boys, one boy at a time, began to quiet down and then sneack up and into their individual desks. In less than two minutes, which, of course, seemed like much more under the steely gaze of D.N. Irani, the class suddenly had become so quiet that had a pin dropped it would have been heard into the next town.

At the end of this seemingly, eternal, thundering silence, Teacher D.N. Irani, said a few words that might have started with... “If I was you and if I were behaving the way you are behaving, I would have been totally ashamed...” After a few minutes, after just a few laconic words and after having us, honestly and earnestly, apologize to Teacher Easy, Teacher D.N. Irani walked out of our classroom and, literally, rode away into the sunset of the day at Sardar Dastur Hoshang Boys High School in Pune, India.

In this recollection, I am probably forgetting some of the details, but I am definitely and totally not forgetting the impact Teacher D.N.Irani had on us boys then and still has on my personal psyche until this day. Also I, absolutely, cannot rule out the fact that I may have been thinking, wondering and mulling upon the question as to what did D.N.Irani do differently compared to Easy.
Today, nearly 40 years later, I am convinced that D.N. Irani may not have been, formally, trained to make higher and authentic impact, he may not also have been privy to the principles for higher impact I am about to share with you. At a very primal level, at a very instinctive level he knew the power of authenticity, he knew the power of silence and true influence that can be learned and practised using one and all of the following three principles.

Congruence:

Teacher D.N. Irani knew the power of alignment between his internal thoughts and external behaviour. He knew that the values he espoused and talked about were the values that he lived and performed regularly and consistently. He knew that being peaceful, and in control on the inside helped him manage chaos and uncertainty that, usually, does occur and exist outside.

When in congruence, we are in total rapport, and in trust, with our own self. Our self-esteem and self image is at a personal high. The highest order of congruence occurs and is sensed and read by others, by our audience. They notice and sense that in this time we are totally aligned, in behaviour and attitude, all the way up to our values and aspirations.

Existence of, and practice of, extreme congruence delivers and creates authentic impact on our worlds powerfully and for a long time.

Presence:

Besides being in total alignment with his inner being, Teacher D. N. Irani was also a master at generating presence and being present through mind, soul and every single cell in his body. Presence and “being present” implies a holistic and high-powered awareness of our own thoughts, intelligence and also of the external stimuli. Presence gives respect to all that surrounds us, acknowledges it and then discerns as to what needs to be assessed, analysed and acted upon. But, way before assessment, analysis and action to be taken for or against external stimuli, presence means awareness, acknowledgement and respect.

Presence not just professes but practices, with deliberation, physical, mental and emotional awareness of what is, what exists and what transpires and grows around us. Presence also, because of the respect factor, always perceives positive possibilities and potential for what we regard and behold with our senses and in our thoughts and emotions.

Those rowdy boys back in the day, including me of course, complimented respect in favor of respect granted them by D.N. Irani. They knew that D.N.Irani did not look down on them and neither did he despise their core, their humanity. He adored and respected them but was in awe and shame of their actions, of their rogue behaviour at that moment.

Presence is and will remain a powerful precursor to creating authentic and powerful impact on others.

Precise Language:

Teacher D.N Irani, like Clint Eastwood a bit, was a man of few words. His language, his tone and his choice of words were never minced, general or contained motherhood statements. He made very few assumptions on people. He also did not exaggerate or understate a thought. He called a spade a spade in the most polite, proper and assertive way as possible. Every time he expressed his thoughts, he’d take his time. He used to choose his words, consider all possible interpretations and impacts on his audience and then, only then, speak up slowly and clearly. Every time he spoke,
I remember as a class, we used to give him a 100% attention and more. His influence on us was strong and it stayed with us long after he’d moved on.

Precision language from the perspective of Neuro Linguistic Programming does not make assumptions, does not generalize, does not chunk up or chunk down thoughts and ideas unless there is a specific purpose for doing so and the outcome of that action is for general good. In precision language a spade is always referred to and understood as being a spade. I am, of course, over here, creating a metaphor. What I mean is that thoughts, ideas and feelings are first clarified, verified and analysed thoroughly for effect, internally, before being expressed.

Being correct, precise, polite and confidently assertive with our expressions and our language is an art and a science that is a major requisite for leadership and authentic impact..

Today, years later, I would not have been able to share these stories and these well-known secrets about authentic impact with you, had I not been inspired and moved by D.N.Irani’s behaviour and successful usage of them back in the day. I also apologize to Teacher Easy for having used him as an example and a reference point to build my story.

Raju Mandhyan
Authentic Impact
www.mandhyan.com

pit bulls & entrepreneurs:identity authenticates intention

2011-07-19T14:33:00.006+08:00

Reflections: Continuation of Chapter 1

Mike Asrani was twenty-five when he came to work for a small company that traded sporting goods in the Philippines. Born and raised in a simple family in Mumbai, he wasn’t too fussy about the quality and the quantity of work he had to do in an alien land. The chaotic and congested streets of his lower middle class neighborhood in Mumbai taught him to survive and thrive in tough times. He had soldiered through challenging conditions and made do with sparse resources. Growing up in a tightly knit, patriarchal family, he disciplined himself to have frugal, simple needs. He also was not easily tempted by things shiny and slick. The sights and sounds of Manila in the early 80s amazed him but did not change his earthy, uncomplicated, and tenacious personality.

Every day, Mike woke up at an early hour, said his prayers, ate a simple meal, dressed in ordinary clothes, and went to work. He put in the necessary effort, concentration, and heart into his job. He took orders well, executed them to perfection, efficiently worked on the reports, kept track of his own performance, and planned his hours and days well. He obeyed orders and followed systems diligently. He didn’t seek any accolades or attention for his work. A job was a job to him, and life was a life to be lived plainly and simply. No complications. No hang-ups.

I knew Mike personally. Initially, his down-to-earth nature, in contrast to my gregarious personality, made him seem bland. Over time however, I realized there were wisdom, strength, and substance in his ways.

The most amazing and awesome truth about Mike was that he knew exactly who he was. He knew he wasn’t a genius like Einstein was. He knew he didn’t have the brilliance of Drucker. And he certainly never mistook himself for a flamboyant Liberace. Mike knew that his looks and charisma wouldn’t be the qualities that would attract anyone to him. He survived with minimum grooming and maintenance.

To him, life was a series of routines. He was regular and predictable with his movements and habits. He learned how to sustain himself on a regular and repetitive diet. His personality and charisma could have done with some major overhauling, but Mike did not care about that; all Mike knew was that he needed to survive and thrive.

In less than two years at work, Mike had figured out the sporting goods trade. He knew where the goods came from, what kind of goods they were, how they were costed, stored, and priced. He knew whom to sell to, where to sell, and how exactly to make a profit from the sales. His earlier job had required him to sell to hundreds of small stores, on credit, across the city and the country. He was given only a motorcycle and a map. In less than two years, Mike had also figured out the streets of Metro Manila and the lay of the Philippine land. He had picked up the local language, the culture, and the nuances of the Filipino business community. He had also discovered the right cultural buttons he needed to push to build mutually beneficial and lasting relationships. He had figured out the cost of living for the next two to three years, and he saved up every shiny and dull centavo he could to allow him to go into business for himself in the sporting goods industry.

He started small. He had no airs. He avoided all fanfare, and he felt no fear. He knew what he had to do. He had to do exactly what his former employers were doing but on a miniscule level and at an extremely consistent pace. He went into business, and he kept up his uncomplicated routine, except that he woke at a much earlier hour than when he was employed. He ate simpler meals. He planned his hours and his days more diligently.

He executed work with higher perfection. He kept impeccable, flawless, handwritten, records of purchases, operational costs, sales, collectibles, profits, and his rapidly growing inventory and savings. He continued to be dull, boring, and charmless. He still didn’t mistake himself for Einstein, Drucker, or Liberace. So focused was he on business that he used to think that Clint Eastwood was a prospect from a shopping mall in Manila called Eastwood. Like the pit bull Cody, he knew his purpose, and lived to serve that purpose.

His business grew. It grew through the revolution of the 80s. It grew through the season of military coups and consistent brownouts of the 90s. Nothing bothered him during the Asian Crisis of 1997. Later in that decade as the 20th century came to an end, he didn’t even hear of the Y2K bug, which had terrified the rest of the breathing world. He just plodded on and on. His business bypassed the Clinton affair, did not bat an eyelash when Princess Diana passed away, and whizzed past the war on terror in Iraq and Afghanistan. Mike displayed consistency and a strong identity in changing circumstances. He nurtured his business like a farmer nurtures his crops -- plowing, digging, sowing, watering, and harvesting.

Unaffected by anything, armed with the concentration of a monk and the single mindedness of a mole, Mike worked through his own disciplines on a daily basis. Sometime before the century turned over, Mike got married, had kids, bought warehouses, built homes, upgraded his vehicles, and kept plugging on. No fanfare, no fear. He kept plugging on through marital issues, pregnancies, childbirths, teething of kids, mumps, zits, chicken pox, broken toys, scraped knees, and falling teeth. He continued keeping his head in his books and his feet on the ground.

Even his choice of a wife reflected his identity. He married a provincial girl with a small degree in marketing but with a large degree of ambitiousness and a strong desire to grow rich. Mike’s unassuming discipline and lack of flash fused well with her diligence and dedication to the business, which had grown quite large. Her skills and ambitious nature armed Mike with a spade to go about his business of being a monk and a mole at work. In a matter of years, his business grew into a humongous family-owned corporation.

In the early years, Mike would deliver his goods strapped behind a motorbike. Now his fleet of vans delivered his goods nationwide. Mike continued to wake up at the same hour, eat simple meals at the right time, put in the right amount of hours into work, and track his own performance and his own account books. He was still hands-on with the buying, storing, and selling. And he raked in, by the millions, the fruits of his labor.

One day in 2005, I met up with him by chance. He was being chauffeured in a large car that was gifted to him by his wife. He was traveling from one of his warehouses to his office. I was impressed by the fancy car, but I was way more impressed by the fact that he was still wearing a t-shirt I’d lent him in the late 80s when he didn’t even own a motorbike. I asked him if he was familiar with any of the new technological gizmos from Apple, and he responded, “No, mate, I like my fruits fresh, in the original form, and purchased from the “palengke. (wet market)”

a preface on pit bulls and entrepreneurs

2011-07-19T13:02:00.004+08:00

from an entrepreneur who loves pit bulls

I am, and have been for the last eleven years, a proud and happy owner of a gigantic pit bull called Merlin. Merlin is now getting along in dog years without losing any of the spring in his stride. In his prime, he weighed a whopping 110 pounds of lean, sinewy muscle, and he was as strong as a buffalo. Leashed, he used to easily haul me and my bulky son for a daily jog. Today, he remains strong and still digs a fun brawl with my little kittens. He also loves peeing on poodles in the neighborhood.

I am also friend to Raju Mandhyan, whom I greatly admire as a professional speaker and a master storyteller—a modern day Scheherazade. He may not have the exotic looks of his ancient Arabic counterpart, but he possesses all her powers of enchantment and can easily mesmerize hordes of jaded cynics. During parties and other business events, I seek his company and want him to keep talking even though I’m always afraid he might start charging me a fee. After all, the man is a much sought-after inspirational speaker in the region.

So imagine my surprise when, one fine day, he calls me to inquire if I knew any owners of pit bulls or associations of pit bull owners because he was writing a book about them. The first thought that flashed through my mind was that the guy had probably lost it. Unlike Scheherazade, he must have run out of stories to share with his audiences and now had taken to scaring them out of their silly skins for a living. A moment later, after he mentioned the words resilience, persistence, and independence in relation to entrepreneurship, the brilliance and the creativity of the comparison struck me and I went, “I love it!”

I know for a fact and from experience that pit bulls are a tough and loving breed. But a few, misinformed, and sometimes malicious sections of the media have unjustly hyped up the negative aspects of the pit bull. Pit bulls are less vindictive and less nasty than all the thumb-sucking, putzy French poodles in the world. Pit bulls, whether small or big, carry within them the genes for the purpose which they had been originally bred—that is to work, to obey, to be responsible, and to love. They will do what their masters will have them do. If you see a ferocious and mean-minded pit bull, then you need to take a look at the human masters. And I assure you that you will find pits of mean-mindedness in them.

Pit bulls are genetically designed to have a singularity of purpose, yet their core is warm and affectionate. My pit bull, Merlin, has never nipped a human being on purpose. The notoriety in the media is undeserved. Given a chance, the pit bulls can easily redeem themselves.

Raju Mandhyan’s thesis is right and timely. Unlike the pit bulls, that breed of human beings called entrepreneurs has been graced and gifted to choose its own destiny. As it is for the pit bulls, it is innate in human beings to want to work, to create, to be responsible, and to love and nurture the communities we live in through effort and enterprise. This book shares the stories of their grit, their gumption, and of the value they add to business and society. If you are an entrepreneur-to-be, then this book will incite you to become a master of your own destiny. If you are already an established and successful entrepreneur, then this book will give you a pat on the back and stoke your passion all over again. In both cases, it will inspire you to leave your mark on the world.

Antonio “Tiny” Defensor, the Master Entrepreneur
with Merlin, the pit bull snoring at his feet

pit bulls & entrepreners; Identity Authenticates Intention

2011-05-28T17:25:00.002+08:00

Identity: the distinguishing but consistent character or personality of an individual in constantly changing circumstances.

Identity is a mental model of one’s self. It relates to an individual’s self-image, self-esteem, and uniqueness. It contributes to how that individual views one’s self as a person and how he or she stands in relation to others around him. The more assured and accepting a person is of one’s own self-image, the more peaceful and stable one’s behavior and performance are in all aspects of life.

Actions:

The pit bull’s not so attractive appearance may induce hysteria. Yet it actually translates to practicality and economy. A pit bull requires minimal grooming and maintenance. Its nature and eating habits are simple and predictable. It has no fancy needs and doesn’t demand much attention like labradors, pomeranians, or poodles do. It is also reputed to be very hardworking and frugal, and it knows its position and purpose in life.

Just by being simple, rugged, and consistent, the pit bull can be very comforting company. His earthy nature lends an air of comfort and support to others around him and even provides a sense of therapy to those who need healing.

A few years ago, Cody, a pit bull puppy, was picked by members of the Even Chance Pit Bull Advocacy of San Diego when he was seen limping around an abandoned shelter. At the rescue veterinarian’s office, his chances didn’t look too good when he was diagnosed with a congenital deformity called ectrodactyly or “lobster claw.” Kind donors, through Even Chance, paid to have an orthopedic surgeon correct Cody’s paw. His two split toes were fused together with the surrounding skin, transforming his “lobster claw” to a “mitten.”

Cody was undergoing water therapy when his nature was discovered to be earthy, simple, and very loving. It was as if his past and pain had softened him rather than traumatized him. Soon, he was adopted by Barbara Sullier, a parent of one of the interns at the clinic.

Barbara described Cody as “a sweet, little, loving boy with a charisma that pulls people over to talk to him. He loves all people and wants to make them happy.” Cody still continued to limp due to missing bones and muscles in his right foreleg, but that hardly affected his style.

His personality and traits soon led him to be trained and certified, at age one, as a therapy dog by the Los Angeles based New Leash on Life’s “Lend a Paw” program. During “wheelchair tests,” Cody would reach up gently and kiss people with disabilities. Children with physical disabilities would easily relate to him and get their spirits boosted by his consistent kindness and even nature.

Through all prejudices and hardships against him, Cody never lost sight of his own, true image. He knew exactly who he was and what his purpose in life was.

"Reflections for an Entrepreneur," in the next issue.

Parenting: Happy, Healthy and Wise

2011-03-21T12:52:00.003+08:00

I am not sure if I can be called a "good" father. That is for somebody else to judge and the ultimate results of my fathering behaviour and skills will only be known years later when the products of my parenting will become successful and happy individuals in their own lives. I may not know if I am good but I definitely know that I am not overstressed as a Dad. I have no issues with my three kids. Each one of them is different and I treat each one uniquely even as I love them equally and with the same passion. Here are some of things I do and say that keeps me cool and unstressed. I do all this knowing that even if I were the best Daddy ever my kids will, eventually, also be affected by the rest of the world and how they manage and process challenges and opportunities in their lives.

One: I many a times say “no” to their needs, demands or wants. I say this knowing that even as I am supposed to be the provider and the nurturer there is the rest of the world which helps provide and nurture them too. I carefully assess their requests and if it is fair and if I can easily provide without short-changing anybody and anything else then I go ahead and say a straight “no.” My kids have grown up with this and they take this well.

Two: I use a lot of humor to get valuable point across. I make fun of myself mostly and in between the setup and the punches I serve the medicine. For example, a son of mine does not clean up after himself. He forgets to flush, forgets to return things and forgets to put off lights, etc.; I have now made him in charge of the electricity, water and cleaning services. Now he cleans up after me.

Three: I make myself an example. Many years ago I used to smoke casually and one day my other son was caught taking a puff too many. I sat him down and I confessed to my own bad habit. Even though I used to smoke not his presence he somehow knew. I promised to stop and I did stop. He followed suit and has walked the line for over seven years now. Be the change you want to create said Ol’ man Gandhi did he not?

Four: I practice appreciation more than I practice criticizing. It’s an infallible truth that rewards bring better results than rebukes do. They say even a verbally abused cow produces less milk than a cow which is complimented and cooed by the farmer.

Five: In the event of failure I quickly and easily “let go.” I let go my kids when they make an unintentional or, even, an intentional mistake. I also “let go” myself when I don’t get the results I expect to get from kids and my interactions with them. Many years ago, I read a Sanskrit “Sloka” which when translated in Hindi meant that a parent shouldn’t blame himself when his kids don’t turn out well and neither should he take credit if they turn out to be good and successful. Our children said Gibran are not ours to own and possess but they are gifts to us and our job is to launch them as high and as far as we can.

When I easily and happily practice these habits I feel happy, healthy and wise and I am sure my kids, as they grow up, will also turn out to be happy, healthy and wise.

The Athenic Code for Public Speakers

2011-03-20T14:06:00.001+08:00

what you focus upon becomes your reality

2011-02-28T09:35:00.007+08:00

On the February 19, meeting of the Association of Appreciative Inquiry, Philippines, [www.aiphilippines.org]I was to explain the concept and the methodology of Appreciative Inquiry in less than 30 minutes to newcomers and guests. I was challenged because I knew thirty minutes wouldn’t do justice to the beauty and the essence of Dr. David Cooperrider's work. It is totally unfair to read off a list the principles and the method for something that can be so powerful and effective in creating deep transformations for individuals and communities.

Choose your words and structure, said my conscious mind and my left brain. Be comprehensive and tactical, said my left and right brain together, ask questions and involve your listeners. Use a story, said my heart and my right brain. All that you need to tell them already lies buried within the depths of their intelligences. They already know what you want to tell them. Just let their deeper wisdom surface and let it dance with what is on your mind.

I gave heed to my right-brain’s thinking.

So there was this King, I said, the father of the person who built the beautiful Tajmahal. He was a Mogul and he ruled India in the 16th Century. He was kind, benevolent and referred to as Akbar the Great. The period in Indian history before and after his death was known as the Golden Age of growth and prosperity. Besides being a good and powerful king, Akbar loved dialogues, debates and dabbling in the arts.

He had a Hindu counsellor by the name of Birbal whose character; personality could be compared to that of Solomon the Wise. Akbar and Birbal fables are popular in India and they work the same way as Aesop’s fables do for the rest of the world. Akbar and Birbal liked to keep each other intellectually challenged and sharp during times of peace and calm in 16th century India.

One freezing evening in Delhi, Akbar looks out onto the royal gardens and wonders out aloud, “Birbal, do you think that there could be a man who would dare step into that freezing pond in our gardens?” Birbal from experience knew that this was bait to one of their famous mind games. He figured, he might as well take it up right away rather than wait for the King to push further. “Oh, sure, your majesty, for a fair purpose and under pressure any ordinary person can last a night standing in the freezing pond,” he replied.

“I dare you, Birbal for a bag of gold that you cannot!” exclaimed the King. Birbal smiled and took up the challenge for a bag of gold coins.

In a matter of minutes, the scene was set. Birbal wrapped in a Gandhi-like loin cloth stepped into the icy cold water as the sun disappeared over the horizon and the moon began to rule the night. In the palace balcony, the King lit a lamp, ordered a sumptuous meal and some drinks. He perched himself onto a large, warm sofa to watch Birbal’s pride and honor freeze and crack in icy waters of the pond. Birbal found the centre of the pond and stood chest deep in the water as the moon began to brighten and the night’s temperature began to plunge. This was showdown at high moon!

All night long, the King puffed away at his Hookah, drank wine and kept propping himself up to enjoy the show. His servants and guards dozed off on their spots but Birbal stood steady and deep in the water that was getting cold by the minute. Hours later, the moon surrendered to the dawn’s light and as the sun peeped out from the east, Birbal, to the awe and surprise of the King, slowly stepped out of the pond, put on his shirt and turban and walked up to the King for his bag of gold.

“In the name of the Almighty, how did you do it Birbal?” roared the King, “What’s your secret? Did you consume some special herbs, a magic potion that kept you warm? How?”

“No secret, your Majesty, it is all in the mind, it is all in the power of focus. What you focus upon, O King, becomes your reality. If you focus upon the cold you will feel cold, if you focus upon the darkness you will be lost and if you focus upon failure then you will fail. That is the secret, your highness!”

“What did you focus upon Birbal?”

“Sire, the little lamp that you lit by the side of your sofa as you sat down to watch me, I focussed upon that. All night long, with all my heart and my entire mind I saw nothing but the lamp; I sensed nothing but the warmth that radiated out of it. I saw nothing but light and I felt nothing but the comfort from its glow.”
That is the power of focus. That is the way of those that appreciate what is good, what is powerful and what is life-giving. That is the essence of being inquisitive and being curious about what CAN be improved rather than what needs to blamed and repaired. That is the power of looking at life and systems as secrets to be unfolded instead of problems to be solved. Appreciation represents love, forgiveness and gratitude while inquisitiveness represents curiosity; curiosity ignites creativity and creativity builds and constructs.

Out of sheer habit and past conditioning most people look for things that do not work, things that they fathom to be problems. We focus, many a times, on the tunnel at the end of every light; we focus on a little chip, a crack on a marble masterpiece rather than appreciating the rest of the beauty and marvel that the work of art represents. When a child is weak in arithmetic we pressure her to become better at it rather than focussing and strengthening her skills in music, arts and literature for which she might have a natural aptitude and a passion.

In his book, How Full is Your Bucket, psychologist Tom Rath talks about how his Grandfather and the rest of his family focussed on his strengths as a kid rather than his weaknesses thus letting him lead and succeed at a life of his own choice and happiness.

Focussing on strengths and on what gives life is more than plain positive or proactive thinking. It aligns itself totally with the value and the psychology behind why successful corporations across the world invest so much in articulating and refining their vision and mission statements. It aligns itself totally with what Peter Senge in his book; the Fifth Discipline refers to as creative tension. We, as people and groups, are drawn towards what we like and hope and we are also driven away from what we dislike and fear. Both these tensions are powerful and both of these natural forces create the environment and the energies for our success. The only minor difference in favor of what we are drawn to is that “what we like” can be placed on a distant horizon while what we dislike and move away from disappears from sight and sense after a certain distance and time. One more factor in favor of a distant, powerful, distant vision is that it can be moved further up and away when we reach the first horizon.

A living example of this power of the positive vision pull, this power of focus towards a bright horizon is the life and the success of Filipino boxer Manny Pacquiao. As a kid he dreamed big and in his youth he achieved it. Recently, after winning dozens of fights and being declared a billionaire, in an interview with Ms. Dyan Castillejo he was asked what lay ahead for him and he smiled and replied in English, “Let’s just say I have reached my horizons and then suddenly my horizons, I realize, have expanded!”

That is the power of focus towards the positive, towards the light, towards Birbal’s lamp and in the essence of all of Dr. David Cooperrider’s principles.

PitBulls and Entrepreneurs, a Comparison

2011-01-31T10:34:00.003+08:00

Pit Bulls and Entrepreneurs

I know, I know! Many of you will be a bit taken aback by the comparison and then there will be some who will say, “Oh, yeah!” The chances are those that will be taken aback may be the ones who do not know your dogs and do not know your entrepreneurs. Then there may be some who will go into a state of shock at the mention of the word_pit bull. Well, for those of you who do get taken aback or, worse, go into a state of shock, you have my apologies and my compassion. You also have my invitation to come and stroll through these stories and allow me to help you discover a world of clarity, creativity, conscientiousness and a raging passion towards achievement, self-fulfilment and self-designed excellence. You will see and learn how many of the wonderful traits that make one species ferocious and wonderful make the other rugged and ragingly successful.

Between the pit bull and the entrepreneur there are certain nuances that similar and different. Placing these two species together highlights the strengths of each and the possible areas of study and synergy for growth, for learning and becoming ferociously effective and brilliantly tenacious as an entrepreneur.

For those of you who went “Oh, yeah!” You know and love your dogs plus hold the pit-bull in reverence then this comparative study will make you smile and revalidate the beliefs you might have had about the secrets behind entrepreneurial success and excellence.

There are several kinds of pit bulls and most all of them are a cross between the English Bull Dog and any one forms of the Terrier. The bull dog’s lineage goes back to the ancient, huge and ferocious Mollosian of the Greek era which, like a bull, was a working dog. Over the years, this crossbreed between the bull dog and the terrier travelled to America in the 1800s and were carefully, further, cross bred to increase their speed, their playfulness and, thus, their intelligence. Today’s pit bull, and the one referred to in this book, could be any one of the several breeds of the American Staffordshire Pit Bull or the American Pit Bull Terrier.

One of the most popular pit bulls was “Pete” from the movie and the series of “Little Rascals.” Other popular pit bulls were owned and loved by famous people like inventor Thomas Alba Edison, President Theodore Roosevelt of the USA and Helen Keller. Unfortunately and sadly, the pit bull has mistakenly acquired a notoriety that runs up chills and hysteria in many people. On the contrary, owners and lovers of pit bulls swear by the intelligence and gentleness of a pit bull. Statistically, they claim, the French Poodle is more vicious, vindictive and prone to attack human beings than a pit bull. The negative media hype has been created based on the looks of a pit bull alone. The strong, aloof and the independent look of the pit bull misleads and gives no clue to its intelligence, loyalty and loving nature.

The pit bull stands apart from most other breeds because of its keen sense of self-identity and self-pride. It rarely bothers to be moved or influenced by the presence of other smaller animals around him. Merlin, my friend Tiny Defensor’s, nine year old, 140 pound pit bull has never bitten anyone its lifetime and it allows Tiny’s pet pussycats to swarm all over him all the time. “He cares a cat’s foot for the pussies!” exclaims Tiny. Brownie, my friend Pinky Sandoval’s, six-year old, 120 pound pit bull constantly lets himself be bullied and barked at her half a dozen pomerians and chihuahuas. The pit bull’s normal reaction to frenzy and nastiness around him is to stand tall, stand apart, walk its walk and completely ignore the riff-raff that surrounds and nags it. It’s like he’s saying to them, “I know exactly who I am and I am totally at peace with who I am.”

Besides having a high sense of self image and self identity, the pit bull of all the known 140 known breeds of dogs in the world also has the rare ability to duplicate the human gesture knows as the “smile.” All other dogs express their joy and satisfaction by barking, jumping or waging their tail excitedly. The pit bull seems to have evolved and stepped ahead of the curve. The pit bull, to express its joy and satisfaction, will raise up and wrinkle its muzzle, display a toothy grin and make his eyes twinkle. This in his imagination is a smile, an expression of approval and happiness. To those that love their pit bulls and know their dogs this is amazing and to those who do not know their dogs this eerie and terrifying. Yes, you can say pit bulls have imagination. This is a rare ability among a few, rare, individual_people who can imagine, duplicate and morph existing facts with new ideas and other non-tangibles. It is for entrepreneurs a rare ability to connect facts from the past with the unseen, unheard and the un-experienced things from the present and create a picture of the future. A future that is possible and filled with productivity, progress and profits for all.

Pit bulls are also known to be really high on love and loyalty for their masters. There are numerous stories about the bond between dogs and man but of all the breeds of dogs, the stories of the pit-bull stand out for strength, sturdiness and fierce integrity. Of all the stories about the pit bull’s image, identity, imagination and integrity the ones that are terrifying are about their fierce tenaciousness and persistence. They say that when a pit-bull, if deliberately abused and angered, gets mad and gets a hold of you then it’ll take an army to pry him apart. This is non-give-up-ness is a core trait of a pit-bull. This is a powerful characteristic ad the ultimate brand image of the pit bull. There is a lesson to be learned in this for entrepreneurs. This trait of a pit bull, from a positive perspective, is a shining lesson in tenaciousness, persistence and hardiness for entrepreneurs.

Now a little story about entrepreneurs before I start highlighting their traits;

Many years ago, I had failed at two attempts at starting and running my own business. The first time, I had failed at putting up a trading business with a partner from the Middle East. The second time I had failed at making success of a small retail business with my spouse as a partner. Sometime in the late 1980, I was in the middle of nurturing a third enterprise. For this third time, before I ventured into it, I spent years understanding and experiencing the trade. I spent years in knowing the supply side and the demand side in the industry. I spent years saving up money and building up other resources and connections in the industry. I’d also spent years in learning the rights skills and competencies to help me become a self-dependant, and a complete entrepreneur.

I remember one morning, six months and a year into it, I was in the middle of strapping some cartons for a shipment when an officer from the Department of Labor and Employment came knocking at my door. He was conducting a random, spot inspection for unfair and inhuman treatment of employees by small business owners.
“As an owner of this company, I wouldn’t mind answering a few questions would I?” he asked.

“Sure! Go ahead and be my guest.” I replied.
“How long has this business been operational and what is it that you do?”
“Well, it’s now been a year and half. We are in the business of trading soft goods like house decor, apparel, handicrafts and stuff. We buy them here, in the Philippines, and then we ship them to clients across the world.”
“Hmm, that must be quite lucrative and how many people do you have working here?”
“Two. A girl and there’s this bloke.”
“Can you please describe the job of the girl?”
“Well, she answers the phone, takes messages, files loose papers, types a letter a day, once in a while makes weak coffee and every fortnight runs to the bank to draw her salary.”
“Right, that sounds like she is the Office Assistant. Awful supporting aren’t they? Does she put in any extra effort for the business?
“Oh, yes, yes! She takes time to fix her hair, powder her nose, file her nails, and chat on the office telephone with her girlfriends on weekdays and her boy-friends on Fridays. Then there are also days when she doesn’t have a boyfriend, she spends her days crying and eating chocolates in the office. Poor little girl!”
“Oh, that’s quite sad. How many hours a week, would you say, does she suffer like this in here?”
“Oh, the poor thing, she comes in a bit after 10 in the morning to avoid the morning traffic and leaves just before 4 in the afternoon, to beat the evening traffic on weekdays. On Saturdays, she drops by for a quick brunch and then leaves to get her hair done.”
“Gosh! That’s over 30 hours a week and does she get a fair pay, social security, health insurance, all the prescribed holidays, annual vacation and sick leaves too?”
“Oh, yes she does get all that plus another three days every month.”
“That’s quite okay. Now about this bloke who works here what exactly does he do?”
“This “bloke” as you call him gets the orders, draws the contracts, does the purchasing, chases the mills for delivery, drives the truck, manages the inventory, packs the shipments, does the billing, cleans the car, answers the phone and makes coffee when Jane is not around.”
“Sounds like quite a handy man. What are his working hours around here?”
“He’s here before the break of dawn on Mondays and then stays till all the work is done for the rest of the week.”
“That’s amazing! Does that mean he also sleeps over here?”
“Yes, on that wooden bench over there by the dog-house.”
“That looks quite inviting and warm. Now, does he get a fair pay for his hours, social security, medical and health insurance, annual vacation and sick leaves?”
“Oh, yeah sure!" He gets two square meals a day, a daily cup of weak of coffee, a pack of cigarettes every month and he is also allowed to sneak off early on Christmas eve and come in a bit late on New Year’s Day.”
“That’s preposterous and inhuman! Sneaks off on Christmas Eve! I think you, Sir, you are an animal, a monster and a slave-driver! Please call that man, here, right now! I’d like to see the poor slob!”
“Sir,” I said quietly, “you are looking at him!”

Though that story, in its entirety, is not at all true, it does come close to putting across the point that an entrepreneur; a business owner has to work, eat and sleep like a dog. He has to put in atrociously obscene amounts of time, effort and dedication for the success of his business. It is all a lot of blood, sweat and tears.

Entrepreneurs do not get born, they are made. In my early teens, I was surrounded by a large, close and distant, family of entrepreneurs. Most all of them either owned a store, a trading business or a small manufacturing or service business. During our family get-togethers they would talk shop, compare notes and share tips on how to start something new or, improve and expand existing businesses. All of them considered owning a business was the most proper and decent way to live. “Working for others?” Well, it was “working for others” and it was looked upon with disdain and shame. There was, and is, pride, honor and freedom to earn and grow exactly as one wished for in a self-owned enterprise.

One of the many, very Indian, catch-phrases my grandfather used to nag me with was, “Apni ghott to mazaa aaye!” Literally translated, it meant, “The fun lies in brewing and grinding your own.” Metaphorically, it meant, “If you want to amount to something, if you want to make it big and be fulfilled then start and build something on your own.” This kind of subtle and consistent programming of our minds by our elders was our family’s culture. The young ones, in response, had no choice but to constantly think, explore, talk and dream business opportunities and ventures. This influence and programming by the elders of the family was quite intense. The long-term results of this culture building were resilience, tenacity and the ability to save, survive and build from scratch. These entrepreneurial habits got seeped into our neuropsychological systems for life.

A large percentage of my family members are still private business owners and continue to breed their offspring into the same atmosphere and culture. I, personally, moved in out of the corporate world and the world of the rugged, resilient and resourceful entrepreneurs. I regard both the breeds with respect and reverence for their skills but here, in this book; I pay homage to the maverick, the jack of all trades—the enigmatic entrepreneur!

Yes, you already know, I am also a deep-hearted lover of dogs. In my life-time, I have been scared by a lot, chased by many, bit by a few and have owned only five but, yes, I love them all. I find dogs to be the intelligent, imaginative, loyal and backed up by a burning desire to succeed and excel at whatever they wish to achieve. All the traits which are necessary for success and excellence in the field of entrepreneurship.

In the ensuing chapters, I will share several stories, secrets and strategies of several successful entrepreneurs I have known personally. I will compare and contrast their traits, their talents and their tales to those of a pit-bull. A dog which, in spite of all the negative media and hype about its character, in reality is a breed that stands slightly taller and slightly apart from the rest of the dogs in the world—just like successful entrepreneurs do amongst other ordinary people.

mandhyan on creative thinking

2010-12-16T11:08:00.001+08:00

mandhyan on creative thinking

the power of desire, selflessness and true belief

2010-12-13T10:34:00.006+08:00

So, last weekend, Boom San Agustin, my friend, was running a seminar on Entrepreneurship and he invited me to offer my books and audio books, The Heart of Public Speaking and The Heart of Humor, for sales in the back of the room. He also suggested that I talk for 12 minutes at the end of the workshop to plug my books. Now I am always happy to talk and I am always happy to support but...I am horribly, terrible at plugging myself and my work for money. A part of me shrivels up and dies inside of me whenever I have to talk about how wonderful my work is and then charge for it.

Anyway, at the end of Boom’s workshop there I was in the back of room waiting to be called. A few minutes before the afternoon coffee break he announced me to a class of 40 or so young entrepreneurs-to-be. As is usual of him he made me out to be a granddaddy of motivational speaking and success. I was still blushing from his compliments when I was handed the mike to speak. Well, I managed to mutter out a few ideas about how a tree is like a person and how a person is like an organization and how an organization should be nurtured like a tree and coaxed towards the sun. Of the given 12 minutes, I used 9 minutes. I must have said something good enough for the crowd cause’ they applauded and several of them rose to buy my stuff. I wasn’t too sure that I had added any value to the event in those 9 minutes. I ran straight for a glass of water for my mouth which was fast drying up.

An hour later, minutes before closing his workshop, Boom was back at complimenting me and he added how sometimes he “borrows” my ideas and models of discussion. At that very minute he was reviewing his 5D approach to Business Disciplines and comparing it to my 5I approach to Interactive Listening. Though I was blushing from his adulation, something inside of me rebelled against his self-deprecating attitude. I stood up, begged for the 3 of the 12 minutes I hadn't yet used earlier, to speak up.

Here’s the gist of what I think I said in the rush and the passion of the moment,

“Boom, ladies and gentlemen, is lying!

That 5D model on the screen is nothing compared to any of my work. It is totally his and, besides, what in heaven’s name is anybody’s original knowledge ever? Whatever I have put out into the world is not mine either because I, as I am doing here, am standing on the shoulders of thousands of thought leaders and giants before me. There is hardly such a thing as original knowledge! Boom applauds me often because in me he sees a reflection of his own self. But I tell you, he is a giant by his own rights and, someday, thousands will stand on his shoulders and reach higher. And...let me tell you what sets him apart, and what makes him a giant. It is represented in the last and the sixth “D” which he Boom forgot to add to his 5D model of Business Disciplines.”

Here I took a longer pause and raised my voice to add, “The sixth D, ladies and gentlemen is the D for...”

At this moment, a delicate, female voice from the audience shouted out, “the D for Desire — deep, burning desire!”

“Yeah!” I went on, “Right! The power of raw, authentic, burning desire also known as intention, dreams, wants or vision. It doesn’t matter what you call it. It is the driving force behind everything you want and everything you will ever succeed at! Boom stands apart because through his talks, through all his work and all his efforts, it is his deep, burning desire that becomes an example, a benchmark and source of inspiration to the world around him!"

"Boom reminds me of a man, from a poem I’d read when I was a kid. In the poem the man is sitting by a river, on a moonlit night, telling his dreams to his own reflection, in the water. When from the skies, quietly but loudly, the moon speaks up. “Man,” he says, “you are crazy to be sitting by the water and dreaming of things you will never realize. Your dreams are cheap. They are nothing but air trapped in fickle water. Weak bubbles and mist is what they are. Blah!”"

"The man by the lake stands up and speaks up. With a tightened chin raised towards the moon he claims, “My dreams, my friend, may be like soft, water bubbles now but believe me you, Mr. Moon, one day they will explode through the water and fly. They will soar through fire and storm to forge into balls of steel and, those balls of steel, my friend, will reach and conquer even you Mr. Moon!”"

"Now, of course, we all know that back in 1969, a man’s dreams did turn into balls of steel, flew and conquered the moon. That ladies and gentlemen is the power of dreams! The power of the last “D” of desire -deep burning desire, which rages in the heart of my friend, Mr. Boom San Agustin! That deep, burning and raging desire will win him his dreams!”

Now you folks probably want to know, “Raju, what the heck is your point. Those are good stories but you haven’t told us anything we didn’t already know? C’mon Dude, tell us something we don’t know!”

Well, folks, let me spell out three things for you while you read my lips.

The number one thing is that before anything else, before doing anything in life and before having all that you want to have... you must want to have it! You must ragingly desire and lust for it so that all the red seas of challenges will rip themselves apart to let you pass. That’s one!

The second thing is when Boom compliments and applauds me he becomes that man sitting by the lake and talking to his own reflection. In the water, Boom sees my face and wants to be like me but what Boom forgets, is that what he sees is a reflection of his own endearing and appealing self. That face in the water he sees is his very own! I am and will always be as fickle as the water in the lake. I will move on and he will remain. He will stand up, reach out and conquer the moons of his dream. The truth is that all the strengths which we seek, admire and adore, usually, lay inside of us. Our heroes are always a reflection of ourselves. Our desires and dreams are, always, the manifestations of the heroes we are!

Now, there is a third thing, a hidden lesson, in this story. I’ll spell it out for you, even as I am sure being the heroes you are, you may have figured it out for yourself.

Remember the two times that I stood up and spoke in Boom’s seminar? The first time my performance, therefore the quality of my success, wasn’t up to par for myself even though I took 9 minutes. The second time, inspite of the fact that I just had 3 minutes, I roared, raged and drove a beautiful message right into the hearts of my listeners. The difference was that during the first attempt I was promoting myself and, trying to sell my books. The second time around my purpose was higher. It was to acknowledge and lift the spirits of another human being. This time my focus was outwards and towards helping another giant of a human being. And that, ladies and gentleman, is the essential difference between success and excellence, between good and great!

Many people, including me, know about these things but it is the walk, not the talk, which counts. When we, gracefully, combine the power of desire, the power of selflessness with a true belief in our own capacities, then all our efforts catapult us straight, beyond the moon, into the foothills of our own heavens!

Raju Mandhyan
www.mandhyan.com
A World of Clear, Creative and Conscientious Thinkers!

Appreciative Leadership

2010-11-28T17:51:00.000+08:00

Appreciative Inquiry 4.wmv

2010-11-28T17:50:00.000+08:00

Build on the Positive

2010-11-01T12:12:00.002+08:00

BY RICARDO SALUDO

Listen in on Filipinos talking about the Philippines and you’re likely to hear one or both of two things: joking and laughter at ourselves and our situation, or a litany of complaints about our country and putdowns of ourselves as a people. Yet we score high on happiness surveys, even more than some of our far more prosperous neighbors, even though we are always quick to point out what’s wrong. The media’s tendency to focus our failings and foibles amplifies our negativism. At the end of this month, a two-day conference at the EDSA Shangri-La may be something our nation can use. The First Asian Appreciative Inquiry (AI) Summit on November 29 to 30 will bring together thought leaders in the art of seeing and building on the positive in organizations and society, focusing on what’s working, not what’s broken.

Among featured speakers are Local Government Secretary and multi-awarded mayor Jesse Robredo and veteran journalist Marites Vitug. Visiting from Ohio’s Case Western Reserve University is the keynote speaker, Dr. David Cooperrider, the originator and leading guru of appreciative inquiry.

Cooperrider has written 14 books and countless articles on the theory and practice of AI, which has adherents in many countries. He advises leading global corporations and is founding chairman of that Center for Business as an Agent of World Benefit, at Case Western. In 2004, he designed and facilitated a UN summit on global corporate citizenship for then-Secretary General Kofi Anan and 500 business leaders.

Leading the summit organizers is AI’s top proponent in the Philippines, Antipolo-based Southeast Asia Interdisciplinary Development Institute (SAIDI) School of OD, which confers M.A. and Ph.D. degrees in organizational development. Headed by Dr. Rosalina Fuentes, SAIDI offers specializations in change leadership, microfinance, local development, social entrepeneurship, human capital management, enterprise leadership, transformative spirituality, and life coaching.

Most management theories and schools of thought concentrate on solving problems and filling gaps. AI asks and expounds upon the strengths of an organization as the starting point and foundation for its journey toward a better future. “All the studies in the world of negative states will tell us nothing about the positive preferred state,” argued Cooperrider in a February 2009 interview. His solution: look at the bright side, the qualities that shine and activities that work.

The AI guru explained that the dominant problem-oriented thinking in management sprang out of the mechanistic view of society and enterprises, which looks for what needs fixing in the machine at hand, which can be an enterprise, a community or a country. Lost in the obsession with problems are the strengths that have in fact propelled progress and growth.

Indeed, Cooperrider said, if you survey people with the question, “Does your company know your strengths and put your strengths into play everyday?” you get just 20 percent saying yes. That means four out of every five employees believe that their capabilities are not fully harnessed. Even if you cut that ratio by half, that still amounts to a sizable 40 percent of corporate brain and brawn wanting to do more.

AI’s core methodology is its four-D’s cycle: discovery, dream, design and destiny. Discovery involves appreciating what gives life and growth, the good things we have now, our sources of strength. Next, we dream, asking what might be, and envisioning the impact of our imaginings. Then we design with others the programs and structures to realize the vision in our dream. Finally, there is destiny, the drive to achieve and empower, learning and adjusting along the way toward the ultimate goal.

In keeping with his positive 4-Ds perspective, Cooperrider likens the process to the wonder and excitement of a child. “Why is uninhibited wonder something we generally restrict to children?” he asks in his OD Practictioner journal article, “The Child as Agent of Inquiry.” In one instructive story recounted in the piece, a 13-year-old student asks his school principal questions like what good things he did in his life and what he is most proud about.

Unlike his usual conversations with students on learning and discipline, the talk with the teenager animated the principal. “I really felt I was on the pulpit,” he recounted. “I was literally looking into the face of the future, exploring the elements of a good society. That night, I could not sleep. I kept replaying the conversation. I got back in touch with a lot of things important to me.”

Put another way, AI highlights the good and how an organization achieves it, which is what we, in our heart of hearts, really care about the most. Or as one writer put it, “you don’t see monuments to critics.” But there are countless statues of the poets, composers, painters and sculptors. Plainly, it is the poetry, music and art that inspire people, not the flaws that critics make it their business to point out.

Just like the principal interviewed by the student, the Cleveland Clinic in 1985 also felt the spark of inspiration from questions focusing on their strengths.

It was that transformative experience that led Cooperrider and his associates to develop the principles and practices of appreciative inquiry, eventually leading to his 1987 doctoral dissertation on AI.

Besides organizational development, the positive approach to addressing issues may even help in political and social conflicts. In his article on how AI could help bring peoce to the Middle East, Cooperrider writes: “Imagine hundreds or thousands of people coming together to generate new images of the world, and then leveraging those revelations for greater progress.” Considering that much conflict is fed by ugly memories of ills and injustices, one can see how the discord can begin to ebb through a 4-Ds shift of mind and discourse toward the good that contending peoples share now and what they could build together.

Perhaps one essential feature of appreciative inquiry that lends itself to both organizational development and peacemaking is its non-dual, consensus-building approach. In seeking the good that we all see and appreciate, AI helps diminish the rivalry between people’s individual perceptions and interests. The “democratization of mind” was how Cooperrider and two co-authors put it in their article on social construction and AI.

Given our eternally fractious, even violent politics, appreciative inquiry may well be just what the Philippines needs.

Ricardo Saludo heads the Center for Strategy, Enterprise & Intelligence ( ric.saludo@censeisolutions.com This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it ). CenSEI includes expert associates in organizational change management and executive coaching.

Building on the Positive by Ric Saludo

2010-11-01T12:11:00.000+08:00

Building on the positive

What am I most Proud of?

2010-10-11T12:02:00.004+08:00

The question that Coach Elizabeth Hoban asked me a few months ago, “Raju, looking back at the last 2-3 years of your professional life, what are you most proud of?” still rings in my ear. Though I briefly responded to that question I still feel, given the fact that it was asked on TV and I had to be brief, that I still want to share the details and the depths of that story.

There was a time, a day in the year 2005, when I was invited by, a friend and a missionary, Jay Tabana, to speak at a large socio-civic get together in Naga City, Philippines. The impression I got from Jay’s invitation was that I was to speak about business leadership to a large audience of 300 to 400 people. This was one of those gigs which we speakers regard more as a marketing mileage rather than an effort at putting food on the table. I took on the assignment and carried a bagful of books to sell to cover travel and lodging expenses.

After a long and a bumpy overnight journey by bus from Manila to Naga, I was put up in a little hotel, upon arrival, at dawn. By noon I was picked up by Jay and chaperoned from the hotel to the venue in a little, metal-upholstered ride on a tricycle to the venue.

Upon getting down I was looking for signs of a large crowd or even a large hall but Jay and his companion led me into the living room of a high-ceilinged, old wooden house. In the living room I leaned against an old-fashioned bar thinking this was just a stop and I’ll soon be led into a hall. When my eyes connected with those of Jay’s he seemed as much surprised and worried as I might have looked at that time. He slowly walked up to me and he said, “This is it. This is where you speak.” “Oh, okay” I said, “you think this room can squeeze in 30 or 40 people?” “I think it might,” he said and then left me hanging with a youngish looking boy who seemed to be the caretaker of the place and who seemed to be all starry-eyed about having to look after me, an expat, and a speaker from the big city. In my shaky and broken tagalong, I asked him if the audience will be coming in soon. “Opo!” he replied excitedly but politely.

At the end of thirty minutes of waiting, six young ladies and a handsome gentlemen, all in their early seventies walked in and, after wishing me a, “Magandang Hapon po!” settled down randomly about the room. I glanced at the housekeeper and he beamed me a large toothy smile and gave me a "thumbs up" sign. It was my time to wire up the mike and get up on the stage.

Now what I haven’t told you is that when I went into this speaking, training and changing other people’s lives’ business, I’d made up my own version of a Professional Speaker’s Athenic Oath.

I swear by Athena, the Goddess of Wisdom and Arts, to keep according to my ability and my judgment, the following Oath and agreement:
To consider dear to me, as my mentor, she who taught me this Heart of Public Speaking; to live in common with her and, if necessary, to share my goods with her; To look upon her children as my own brothers, to share them wisdom and hope.
I will serve one or a thousand at a time and never shy away from sharing. I will speak regardless of speaking tools and comforts like a mike, a lectern, a podium or planned notes. I will speak in the sun, the shade or pouring rain and I will always deliver on my promises.
I will sweat, bleed and labor to preserve the purity of my profession and my arts. In every hall I speak, I will speak only for the good of my listeners, keeping myself far from all intentions of ill-doing and personal gain.
If I keep this oath faithfully, may I enjoy my life and practice my art, respected by all men and in all times; but if I swerve from it or violate it, may the reverse be my lot. This I swear!”

So, I began to speak. The crowd of seven in my halls were all small business owners who, for decades, had been making and selling Filipino sweets like Polvoron, Peanut Brittle and other Native Candies. I spoke about persistence, patience, systems, structures, branding, succession planning, packaging and distribution, building teams, hiring and training right and building business that would last not just their lifetimes but become a legacy and a bequest to their families and to the nation. They were happy and thrilled. They asked a lot of questions, shared their fears and their hopes and at the end of three quick hours, they shook my hand, gave me a few toothless smiles and walked out of the halls.

The thing that I am most proud of today but was surprised about it then was that throughout those three hours I’d forgotten that I was there to give a speech in English! Another person, another being from inside of me had reached out and connected with my customers in a language of their mothers--Tagalog with a smattering of English. Yeah! This is true. I know it because I still have to collect from those customers whom I sold my books on credit as they walked out of the halls. Unless, of course, I have already collected in kind and spirit from them in another place and another time. In all cases, i am sure, someone up there is maintaining a good book of accounts.

The lesson I recalled during this experience and which still resonates in my heart bring forth the words of my dear, departed mother who used to always say to me, “Son, those who don’t know how to dance generally blame the floor.” If you really and truly and wholeheartedly want to accomplish something then come rain or shine you will accomplish it and the whole material, emotional and spiritual world will conspire to help you accomplish it too.

Here is the clip of Coach Elizabeth Hoban asking me that question, “What am I most proud
of/” http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g0Zl8v6oe1k

The Leader as a Storyteller...Part 1

2010-09-10T15:16:00.005+08:00

Several years ago at a talk for a Call Center Training Institute in India, I was
asked by one of the participants, “Sir, What makes a perfect leader?”
The first thought that flashed through my mind was that the young gentleman
asking the question had not experienced life yet and, in response, a smile grew
on my face but I held the smile back and went through the images and the ideals of several leaders I had studied and read about.

Abraham Lincoln was good but yet he was assassinated. There was someone who wasn’t too happy with him thus Lincoln could not have been perfect. Mahatma Gandhi was known for his staunch authenticity and he helped free a nation but still some found him flawed and shot him too. Currently known and respected leaders also have had their ups and downs, and they too cannot be deemed to be“perfect.”

Our perceptions of leaders and the concept of leadership run the gamut of brave, strong, sensitive, democratic, visionary, action-oriented, creative,
constructive, transformative, situational, emotional leaders and more. Thus,
there is no perfect description or a theory about leaders and leadership. It is
like that story of six men who could not see the elephant but drew their
judgments based on what body part of the elephant they were able to touch.

The one who held the trunk of the elephant thought the elephant was like a big
fat-water hose, the one who touched the elephants leg thought it to be like a
tree trunk and the others thought the elephant was a rope, a wall, a horn,
and a fan depending on what body part they were able to touch or grasp.

Now the descriptions of leadership may be diverse, and sometimes downright
ambiguous, but the tools of practicing leadership are limited and many a time
well defined. Tools such as active listening, clear imaging, creative planning,
awareness, action and the science behind inspirational storytelling come quite
handy to affect the acts of leadership. Through fables, parables, anecdote and
corporate storytelling, leaders can put across, quite quickly, hard to comprehend
concepts. Through story telling leaders can heal broken hearts and inspire
their armies. Through storytelling leaders can catalyze change and inspire
action and excellent performance. Through story, leaders can help the world
realize and understand truth.

The power behind storytelling is best highlighted by this little folk tale from
Israel.

Once upon a time, a long time ago there lived these two beautiful women in Israel. Their beauty was legendary and the people of Israel loved them both immensely.

One day, as is normal for all celebrities, these two beauties became insecure
and uncertain about their beauty and about their status in life. So out they
walked on the high streets of Jerusalem to see if they still drew any attention
and applause. On the streets, the bolder of the two stepped up and ahead of the
other in all her glory but nobody even glanced at her. “That is impossible.”
she thought and became a bit more bolder[excuse the grammar] and marched onto
the streets clicking her heels. This time, at her brashness, people turned their
faces away in disgust. She was devastated and in response, in her boldest form
ever, she stomped down the streets of Jerusalem again. People
ran into their homes and slammed shut their doors in her face.
Heartbroken and in deep shame, she swore never to expose herself again.

The other beauty, meanwhile, put on her best multi-colored coat, stuck some flowers in her hat and bells in her anklets and swung out onto the street with her purse. She waved at strangers, smiled at the Rabbis and laughed with the kids at play on the streets. The people of Jerusalem fell all over her. “Beautiful! Lovely! Celestial!” they all shouted. She was one with them and one of them!

The secret was that there was really no difference in how they both looked. What
really set them apart was the fact that the first one was called Truth and the
second one’s name was Story.

When leaders, for influence, use stories five things happen .Stories;

ACTIVATE the WHOLE BRAIN
Though we all use the whole brain in all we do but there tends to be, because of years of training and programming, a tendency towards left-brain domination in our interactions. When faced with a story our left brain dominance takes a back seat and our interactions become holistic and easy.

SEEP through CEREBRAL DEFENSES
For reasons similar to the previous point and for reasons of self protection we tend to ward off with logic anything that is new and unknown to us. When faced with a story our conscious and more cognitive mind draws back its analytical claws allowing new ideas and information to be exchanged with lesser resistance than normal.

INVOKE CREATIVITY and INCLUSIVENESS
Upon hearing stories our mind assumes it’s going to play and have fun… and this invokes creativity and a desire to participate. The right brain moves in and views the proceedings from a bird’s viewpoint. There is fun and lightness in this whole-brain approach and makes the listener much more participative because he feels part of the story forming and creation.

CATALYZE RAPPORT and ACTION
Since whole-hearted participation is not just a mental thing, stories also rouse us into wanting to do something, to model the heroes in the stories we hear and perform other acts of courage. Stories also, because of their playful nature generate laughter and, Daniel Goleman in his book The Primal Leader claims, laughter nurtures the open loop nature of man. Stories thus build rapport amongst players at work and catalyze action and teamwork.

ANCHOR Ideas and Values into our EMOTIONS for LIFE
Stories, intrinsically and essentially, highlight strengths, positivism and idealism thus firming up old and new values to make us emotionally strong. Through storytelling all concepts and facts anchor themselves into our emotional brain and in our long-term memories.

Thus, effective leaders, teachers, trainer, mentors and coaches know and recognize the power of storytelling and usually deliver, hard to digest truths in the form of a story.

Leader as a Storyteller Intro.wmv

2010-09-10T14:28:00.000+08:00

Action & Innovation

2010-05-30T12:33:00.001+08:00

After years of reading, writing, researching, teaching and working with businesses at enhancing creative thinking in workplaces I have come to one happy conclusion. The conclusion is that at the core of all efforts at coming up with creative ideas, and innovating products and processes lies the fact that “action speaks louder than words!”

People in research, design, planning, marketing and strategizing constantly bleed and sweat over what wonderful thing to do next and how to come up with an idea that will rock the world and save money at the same time. Consultants like myself, catalyze the bleeding and the sweating further by dishing out multiple, hair-brained techniques and methods to “enhance creativity in individuals and organizations.” The whole circus is a vicious circle of futility rather than creativity and creative thinking. The power truly lies in A C T I O N and execution. Though, I am tempted to, I will not quote Nike over here. Nope!

What businesses need to learn and master is the ability to go out on a limb again and again. Individual and organizations need to learn to live with ambiguity and risk. The world outside; the economy, the ecology and the mind of the masses is and always will be in a constant flux. Market conditions will change, trends will change and the world will turn. Speed and action to market is important. Pro-acting to feedback and corrections is important. Getting into the thinking, designing and delivering into the pit is important.

It is vital that organizations not just follow a three-step, a five step or a seven-step method into higher creativity and breakthrough innovations but also give priority to conclusions and ends. Start backwards if we have to but constantly put something out there into the midst of the market and let the world decide if your ideas are worth the paper they have been brainstormed upon. Yes!

Authenticity and Public Speaking

2010-05-05T11:19:00.004+08:00

Deep within your brain lies the amygdala_ also referred to as the “reptilian brain.” This part of the brain exercises no logic, rationality or order. It thrives on passion, fear, and rage.

The “fight or flight” syndrome during public speaking, originates from here. Manifestations of this syndrome are sweaty palms, increased heartbeat, a parched throat, and knocking knees.

Once, I observed a sales director of a large multi-level marketing company who had the habit of calling for a round of applause every few minutes during his speech. In the din of the applause, he’d gulp in air to soothe his fears and then continue.

Remember that fear always lurks behind perfectionism,
Confronting your fears and allowing yourself the right to be human can, paradoxically, make you a far happier and more productive person. – Dr. David M. Burns

A much better way to manage this fear is to constantly reach in and reclaim our authentic, inner being. Authenticity is achieved, as discussed earlier, by an honest appraisal of our objectives, purpose, and ulterior motives. After this, even if the structure and style of our speech is not that great, it becomes what my kids call “real”.

Many years ago, Mario Garrolinni, a speaker friend of mine died in a motorcycle accident. Several of his friends from the speaking and training business turned up to give eulogies at his wake. They all spoke with eloquence, wit, and style but the speaker that outshone them all was an old and humble mechanic from Mario’s factory.

He came up stooped shoulders, wrung his hands in agony, and stumbled through his words while clutching at the front of his shirt. He spoke of how much he loved Mario and shared happy little anecdotes of their friendship.

His language was simple. He wasn’t stylish or educated. As he spoke, there were tears and laughter in his eyes. After he finished there were tears and laughter in the eyes of everyone present. He was speaking the plain truth in simple words, authentically. Whenever, I get anxious or egotistical, I remember that old, humble Filipino mechanic and I simmer down and tap into my own authentic nature.

I am also not a big believer in the adage of “fake it until you make it”. I’d rather be honest, work hard and straight, and then “make it” so I don’t have to “fake it.” There are times that when you confess ignorance or inexperience you expose yourself to humiliation. But, confessions of truths can also make you endearing and human.

One day, Herbert Lee from Macau, a speaker/trainer friend of mine, spoke about how important it is to expose your inner self to create a better rapport. “You gotta open your hearts!” he cried. To prove this point to his audience he unbuttoned the front of his jacket, yanked his necktie off, and grabbed his shirt by the collar as if to rip it off. The audience leaned back and gasped, not knowing what was coming next. They didn’t want to see a nude speaker! With a flourish, my friend tore the shirt off his body, leaving his jacket on. The audience erupted into amazed laughter when they realized his shirt was a trick-shirt designed to be ripped off and away from under his jacket!

Herbert, though, had made his point that one must expose himself to be accepted and to be liked by his audience.

Sincerity and openness are major factors that can help you overcome your fears. While preparing to deliver a speech, ask yourself the following questions.

First, is the content of my speech true?
i. If there are facts, numbers or anecdotes that you are not sure of, not using them will cut down your anxiety.
Second, Am I telling half-truths and avoiding facts?
ii. If you are vague about concepts and are avoiding the real issues just so that you can fulfill the task of presenting, then you will be doubtful and fearful.
And third, what is my ulterior motive behind all the statements and suggestions?
iii. If your motives are well meaning and will truly benefit the audience, it becomes easier to speak with power, style and confidence.

This tapping into our authentic nature, expressing truths and overcoming anxiety through deep introspection forms the most important layer of the Heart of Public Speaking.

the birds, the bees and the flowers up the wall!

2010-04-14T11:16:00.002+08:00

Just the other day someone asked me if I’d heard about Vertical Farming. I said I had but wasn’t too thrilled about it.

“Why?” he exclaimed surprised.
“Uh, because it is trying to correct a problem originally created by ourselves.”
“How is that? Doesn’t it make sense that people will not have to go far out of the cities to get their needs filled?”
“That does make sense but it is a stop-gap solution. The question that we really need to ask ourselves is what has driven us to live in such tall structures, what has driven us to live in such a congested manner and what has driven us humankind to be one of the largest numbers of inhabitants on earth?”

The truth is that we have really overcrowded the earth. There are billions of us digging into the crust of the planet, ‘de-treeing’ the forests and ‘dam-ming’ the rivers and the oceans in the name of progress. We are converting everything into wrought iron, plastic and mortar and then piercing it into the heart of the earth and erecting structures which shoot miles into the sky in defiance of nature and natural forces. We call them skyscrapers and we think that is “oh' so smart of us as a civilization.” How far away is that kind of thinking compared to inventing electric saws to chop down trees or throwing sticks of dynamite into the ocean so the fish will pop out of it dead and murdered.

Every time we as a race and as a society have taken a decision we have believed it to be the smartest decision ever. When we split open an atom we thought that was a scientific breakthrough until it was also used as atom-bomb to kill thousands. When we conquered the oceans we believed that to be an achievement until the waste and spills from our tankers began to poison every single inhabitant that lived in the waters. We are thrilled at being able to fly from one continent to another at breakneck speed not realising that that just gets us doing the digging, the de-treeing and the dam-ming much faster and much more globally. Somebody has to just stop and ask. ‘Why? Where are we going with all this activity? What is the higher purpose? What is the universal vision?

Is our long-term goal to be the most populated species on earth? Is our purpose to smelt plastic, metal and mortar into horrendously vertical constructions, pump up the rivers onto the 141st floor so we can wash our hands after nibbling on frog-legs and celery plucked from the farm next door? Einstein was wrong when he helped us unleash nuclear power but he was right when he said, “No problem can be solved from the same level of consciousness that created it.”

Mankind’s intentions are essentially good but mankind’s decision making is dependant only on the intellectual, emotional resources available to it from the environment and that which is true in the present moment. All wisdom is gained in hindsight by connecting the dots backwards. Very rarely have we practiced creativity and creative thinking which is not demand driven, which is not circumstantial and reactive.

I am not offering answers because I do not have any. I am just raising questions and inviting caution before we coerce our flowers and fauna to scramble up on horrendously vertical skyscrapers. I am inviting long-tem concern, thinking in systems and a refrain from applauding our own thinking and actions before we drive the birds, the bees and the flowers up the wall again!

Why Coaching Sales Creates Champions

2010-04-14T11:05:00.002+08:00

Though early on in my career I did not get any sales specific training I was fortunate to intern under several successful sales champions. My mentors had learned their skills through the school of hard knocks and over a long period of time. Mentoring me, though, was far from their minds and all they really cared was if I made enough sales and if my success at sales put money into their coffers. Amazingly though, and such is life, I picked up a million little lessons from them which over time gave me an uncanny and an unfair advantage over many sales people and endeared me to my clientele and the market I played in. The learning was in-depth and the growth was exhilarating and long lasting. Years into the profession, when side by side with my mentors I had developed an uncanny and subtle set of playing rules which almost always helped me close deals and serve my clients consistently and to the benefit of both sides.

Over time, I realized that the art of selling was not just an art but an extremely refined science. The rules of this science, in the past, were learned through by getting into the pit again and again. Today, the culture of learning through long and strenuous interactions over a l o n g period of time does not need to be continued. It still has its benefits but keeping in mind the principle of “Anything can be accomplished if the task is broken down into small enough steps,” from the school of Nuero Linguistics Programming, a sales leader can transfer these uncanny and subtle set of playing rules to almost anyone willing to learn and wanting to make a success out of his sales career.

Across the world trainers and sales consultants like me have now packaged these playing rules into principles and practices which can be mastered in a matter of months if not weeks. Gone are the days when a successful sales person or a team leader would get on stage and boost the spirits of his teams through stories and admonitions towards sales success. Today, the name of the game is Sales Coaching—and, it is potent and powerful in real time and in measurable terms.
Sales Coaching brings about a multitude of benefits at the individual, the team and the organisational level.

At the individual level, sales coaching starts with the assumption that if you can dream it then you can achieve it. This becomes an extremely powerful a paradigm for the sales person because it starts with the belief in her potentiality, its helps unleash her latent strengths and it helps her leverage on her own past successes no matter what field or discipline she comes from. Sales coaching, at the individual level, instead of imposing the manager’s or the organizations belief systems on the salesperson helps her uncover her own driving values. It help her fine tune her skills in complete alignment with her own beliefs and potential.

At the team level, Sales Coaching, helps distribute work load and challenges based on personal preferences and competencies of each player. It helps teams eliminate links which may be weak and move from strength to strength to strength. Steven Covey highlights this synergy of strengths by creating a metaphor of loading a single wooden plank with a measured downward pressure, followed by laying another layer of a wooden plank on the first one. The downward pressure and weight thus carried by two wooden planks not just doubles in tandem to the number of planks but increases multi-fold. Such is the power of Sales Coaching for a team. It strengthens each player individually and then bonds them together with their strengths thus reducing team weaknesses. At the practical level, a manager-cum-coach can assess individual strengths and assign tasks and territories to build on strengths instead of just logistical and market demands.

At the organizational level, Sales Coaching helps in the following ways:

• Essential knowledge and organization culture is retained and enhanced in the process.
• Employee engagement and thus retention peaks up because of increased performance and satisfaction.
• Alignment of personal, team and organizational goals are constantly aligned thereby boosting rapid and sustainable growth.

In summary, the business of old-fashioned sales training has taken on a new and a vibrant face. Instead of sweeping statements about successes and successful behaviour during sales it now is a fine-tuned, highly refined and custom made one on one learning. It is not just faster, better and cheaper but it is also creative, conscientious and constructive. A well-designed sales coaching program addresses the needs of individuals, teams and organization in the areas of culture, processes, characters, visions, and competencies. A well designed sales coaching program also provides knowledge, skills and true wisdom for playing well in the pits, where the true action is.

Power Persuasions

2010-03-03T16:46:00.002+08:00

A huge majority of us are, to a certain level, hyper-active and lack the ability to focus on things for long. In some ways we resemble a flock of birds chirping away at nothing and for this we can happily blame it on the nature of our creation. In many ways we are affected by the fast changing, constantly chaotic, circumstances which surround us. The bottom-line, though, regardless of whether it is nature or nurture that makes us, is the fact that we are always in a state of flux.

To give positive direction and constructive shape to the change that is constantly happening to us requires that we develop skills to navigate or anchor ourselves at a deeper, primal level closer to our identities and emotions. To give positive direction and constructive shape to change in others we must also develop the skills and abilities to create a shift for them at a deeper and a more emotional level in them…read more

Dr Robert Cialdini, known for his popular book on persuasion and marketing, Influence: The Psychology of Persuasion makes claim to six laws that can create a shift in others and these, very quickly, are;

• Reciprocity - People tend to return a favor for a favor. Thus giving the power to one who does the first favor.

• Commitment and Consistency - If people commit, orally or in writing, to an idea or goal, they are more likely to honor that commitment.

• Social Proof - People will do things that they see other people are doing.

• Authority - People will tend to be influenced by authorities and celebrities.

• Liking - People are easily persuaded by other people that they like.

• Scarcity - Perceived scarcity will generate demand and therefore give power to the one owning title to the things in demand.

These laws are good and make a lot of social sense. I agree with them absolutely and would add to these facts the current research from the fields on Nuero-psychology. What support and enshrouds all these laws is the fact that deep change occurs at the levels where our emotions and memories reside. It is the images, the sounds and the feelings of past experiences of joy and sorrow which become a powerful driving force behind the choices we make today, behind the actions we take today and destiny that we shape for our tomorrows.

Change at and around the seat of our emotions and past experiences is brought about a careful construction and morphing of the verbal and non-verbal language that we use in our day to day interactions with our family, friends and colleagues. Those that recognize the power of the words we weave have learned the art and science of it over time, through deliberate effort and razor-sharp awareness of their own thoughts, mental processes, ideas and emotional shifts. Those that master these skills and develop intuitive competencies stop being like a bunch of sparrows atop a tree but become soaring eagles in the sky that fly down sharp and swift for a purpose and then fly back into the echelons of personal performances and achievements.

History Repeats Itself

2010-03-02T08:22:00.003+08:00

The other day at the bank, Lisa, my young and attractive bank officer was telling me how her mother had taken a fall, and while waiting for hip replacement, was confined in a hospital in the USA.

While Lisa was talking to me, I was watching her eyebrows and wondering how painful it must be for girls to undergo all that plucking. I was wondering how she would look if she let her eyebrows grow. Coming out of the trance, I looked up and brightly asked her: “Hey how’s your mom? Does she still live in Japan?”

Right! I was hearing her but I hadn’t been listening! I was physically present but spiritually gone. I was hearing her but I wasn’t listening. Listening requires engagement, comprehension, absorption, and processing while hearing is only a function of the ears.

We spend half of our waking time communicating with others and the other half listening. In school we are taught how to read, write, and recite, but have any of us spent time learning to listen fully? If we learned to listen with our heads and hearts, we’d be able to manage our time projects and plans much more efficiently.

Putting our heads and hearts together makes us not just attentive, but also watchful of our own input. Our partners, our customers deserve that and some more from us. Call this behavior “Listening Mindfully.”

Listening Mindfully will benefit you by:

• Making you aware of your own intentions and authenticity.
• Strengthening and improving your relationships with your colleagues, customers and community.
• Giving you the ability to bring about positive and meaningful change in the world.

In all conversations, Listening Mindfully can be achieved by taking these five simple steps:

1. Investigate Intentions. Before entering any conversation, find out what it is that you really want to achieve. An honest appraisal of your intentions will keep you engaged and make your customers feel served well.

2. Increase Awareness. While you are listening, clear your personal, mental clutter. This could be anything from nagging thoughts, to lists of things to do, to plans for the day. Postpone these thoughts, increase awareness, note change in tone, and pitch and pace of speaker. Look for underlying feelings and visualize your mind consciously capturing key ideas.

3. Interact with Interest and Enthusiasm. Listening is also done with your eyes and body. Maintain eye contact and lean towards the speaker. Every now and then blink with approval, nod, and smile or participate gently by uttering words like “uh-uh,” “hmmm,” or “I understand.” Keep this participation genuine and non-intrusive.

4. Inquire and Re-Phrase. All transfer of information, knowledge, or ideas from one mind to another generally leaves a small percentage of the unknown. Clarify and fill that gap as much as possible by making simple, direct, and inoffensive questions. Rephrase ideas or create comparisons to further solidify understanding.

5. Inscribe Impressions. Whenever and wherever possible take quick and colorful notes. You know what they say about remembering, “A blunt pencil is better than a sharp mind.” This will help you put down your impressions and review ideas and perceptions later.

Follow these five simple steps and your customer service experience will jump up several notches. Also, the next time you are in a bank with an attractive bank officer, it will help keep your mind where your body is. History repeats itself only because people do not listen mindfully the first time!

Raju Mandhyan
www.mandhyan.com

CSR: Learn not Teach

2010-01-29T15:06:00.004+08:00

One of my sons has come of the age when he has to make the choice to study further or plunge into the world of business. So far he has been a good son, an outstanding student and a very responsible citizen of the world. His teachers at the Ateneo de Manila University do take note of his performances and they have rewarded him with the right accolades and scholarships too. In life, he seems poised correctly to take off from being a good boy to a man to be respected. I take pride in this fact but claim no credit. As far as I am concerned, he is a self-made man already.

While driving about town, sometimes, we have healthy conversations about business, politics, social issues, life and about living gracefully. I must confess that I, more often than not, pick up more lessons than I think I give out.

One particular Sunday morning, just a week after I made a presentation at the Asian Forum on Corporate Social Responsibility [CSR] in Manila, I was telling him about how people across the world are waking up to the realities of the rampage we have created, in the guise of development and growth, we have created on earth. I was also telling him how happy I was that thousand of individuals and organizations in the know are now doing the right thing by healing the earth, nurturing the needy and educating the ones not in the know. “People,” I said, “are essentially good, and when given the freedom and the resources will most likely do the right and the noble thing.” I was happy, I said, that many large business groups do not regard the concept of CSR just as marketing and a business strategy but more as a way of life. On other occasions most of our conversations had been, of course, about developmental work and study opportunities in the USA or Europe for him. His city of choice, to live, work and or study, he’d mentioned many a times to me, was San Francisco. Today, he just sat and heard me out quietly.

A few days after that one-sided chat, we were back in the car again.

“Pa,” he said “there’s this professor at school who was telling us about this developmental assignment in one of the remote provinces in the Philippines.”

“What about it?”

“It’s an eighteen month teaching assignment for high-school level kids in a village where there is no electricity and potable water.”

“And?”

“Well, I am seriously considering taking it up.”

Without thinking and very carelessly, I blurted out, “Why?”

Allowing no pause and with a quick frown on his good-looking face, he exploded, “What do you mean, why?”

That shut me up good for the rest of the drive. Again, instead of teaching, I’d learned. Likewise for CSR, I realized I need to learn not teach, do and not talk, live it and not just employ it as a business strategy.

Innovation Factory

2009-12-04T14:14:00.003+08:00

Meeting up with Robert Tucker in Manila was a pleasure. Comparing notes, getting insights and drawing sensible conclusions about creativity and innovation has usually been a slippery process. Every single individual and every single industry have ideas of their. Robert shared the concept of his Innovation Factory and I walked away with three major conclusions.

One: One Size Doesn’t Fit All
Idea generation, capturing possibilities and executing that flux may all be logged in and read as that we must think out of the box and we must stretch our minds but how far individual ideas can be stretched is totally made to order and custom designed. You got to come up with a process that works for you. What worked for Google, Starbuck, 3M, Evian and even Mang Inasal may not work for you. You will have to mix your own.

Two: Execution is Key
None of the names mentioned would have known how wonderful their ideas were had they not taken them to market. Out in that nebulous territory called the “market” roam beasts and beauties of undefined shape and size. You may research, reason, position, plan and strategize but it will only be the results that will give you a true reflection and a report.

Three: Make your Approach Methodical
In essence, when you mix your own, make sure you keep track of the ingredients you use, the measures you use and how long each individual process stays on the burner of intention and focus.

I like to think in terms of preparing, persisting, percolating and performing towards creating something out of nothing. Towards making new what doesn’t work well and even what may be working perfectly well at this time.

I had the opportunity to peek into how Kraft comes up with new products, process and promotions for their products. They partner, they purchase, they persist but way before they do all that they prepare to come up with something new. Their work areas are colourful, spacious and laid out to trigger ideas and teamwork. They nurture their research and development teams with volumes of select information; they are exposed to new theories and methods of thinking and action.

All this leads to products that are yummy, a presence in the market-place that is unshaken-able and a perch where Kraft, always, gets a glimpse of the curves ahead.

Five Sensible Ideas for Meetings

2009-12-04T12:55:00.004+08:00

The whole world is constantly participating in meetings. “Let’s have a meeting,” “I am in a meeting,” “Call you right back after the meeting,” are statements you hear all the time. Sometimes, it makes me wonder if most everyone I know is so often in one meeting or another who then, in heaven’s name, is minding the, proverbial, store? Who is building the bridges and who is baking all the bread in the world?

The truth is that a lot of time, across the world, is being wasted in and during meetings. Should we be able to capture all the wasted energy from the din and noise generated during meetings then we would have no energy crisis. We’d be cutting down lesser trees, digging up lesser oil and, leaving lesser carbon foot-prints on the face of this lovely planet. The air will be clean, the oceans will start cooling down and the birds will start flying south again.

A typical meeting usually starts late and it involves catching up with others, waiting for the late-comer, listening to his excuses and a traffic-report of the city, bringing him up to speed, ordering coffee, re-reading the minutes of the last meeting, plugging the computers, logging onto the net and rushing through the true agenda so as to catch up with the next meeting at another venue.

If this is even partially true for you then here are five quick ideas to bash up the beast of bad meetings. Five ideas is a good number because it represents the number of sensory inputs and outputs and research in the field of neurosciences has shown that the conscious mind can only juggle and manage seven plus minus two chunks of information at a given moment. With nine chunks of data we are at peak performance therefore stressed. With seven we perform at medium stress but at five chunks we are relaxed, participative and also creative.

Idea One: Email everyone, a substantial time before the meeting, a five-point agenda that is more illustrative than narrative. Use sketches, diagram and flowcharts because pictures are easier to remember than words. Assign expectations and tasks for that individual. Keep it simple and to the point.

Idea Two: During the meeting issue a little more detailed version of the same illustration to everyone with their roles and tasks color segregated. Allow space for that individual to make and takes notes. Look up Edward De Bono’s ‘Six Thinking Hats’ and use the science behind that. Throw out one of the hats or use it as a pan to collect penalties from the late-comers, the hecklers and the time-wasters in meetings.

Idea Three: Choose one big, hairy goal for the meeting and less than four minor goals to be achieved as outcomes of the meeting. Hang a large sign of the big, hairy goal where everyone can see it before and during the meeting. The large visual aids focus and like bees to honey everyone will keep directing their conversations to the big, hairy goal. The minor ones will fall in place just like dominoes do.

Idea Four: Allow a few minutes before the meeting ends to make a bonfire out of the big, hairy goal sign and the small illustrative notices that you sent out. Capture the outcomes of the meeting in an illustrative format and sketch out the measures and the big hairy goal for the next meeting. Oops, scratch out the last sentence! Your every meeting should be like you’ll never have to meet again.

Idea Five: All research, option generation, plans, milestones, measures are elements of cerebral thinking but true choices are made from the depths of our hearts. Treat each other with respect, kindness and empathy so as to nurture their emotional sides but let the late-comers, the time-wasters and hecklers be pirated by the competition.

Practice these five ideas if you like or chuck them out the window. It is best to just roll up your sleeves and bake that bread, build those bridges or chill by the beach.

Here’s hoping your meetings are always lean, mean and the coming year happy, healthy and wealthy for you!

Author, Coach and Trainer
Raju Mandhyan

While Speaking Where Do I Put My Hands

2009-11-08T07:21:00.006+08:00

Have you ever watched Asian dancers from India, Indonesia, Japan, or Thailand? They have these exotic dance routines where the story behind the dance is beautifully and eloquently expressed through the movement of limbs backed up by facial expressions. You may have also seen people communicate through graceful hand movements and expressions. These dances and sign languages can be mesmerizing to watch because they create such clear images.

Most of us, especially those who are high on auditory learning, are not so proficient with using our hands. In reality, hand gestures are very powerful and effective visuals. Imagine the impact of hitting your fist into an open palm when insisting upon a point. Imagine the effect of placing your right hand on your heart while talking about personal things, and imagine the honesty expressed when you spread open both your palms towards your audience. With appropriate gestures, you can increase impact and enhance connectivity with the audience.

Here are some pointers on how to keep your gestures natural, effective and in sync with your words:

• Start with hands loosely held over your belly-button area, prayer style.
• Visualize your head and your body down to your waist level enclosed in an imaginary frame like a photograph. Work your gestures from within that framework. Any gestures that go out of the frame will appear loud and sometimes impolite.
• Do not point your index finger at the audience. No! You are not Uncle Sam that says, “I want you” with a scowl on his face and his index finger pointing! Instead use an open, upward facing palm.
• Let your hand movements be in sync with your words. When you say “big” raise your hands high. When you say “small” lower your hands with palms facing downwards.
• When you want to convey excitement rub your hands together or close them into a grip, lean forward slightly and emote expressions.

All through managing your body language, your facial expression and your hand gestures do remember that mind and body are one linked system. What you feel and think in your mind will show through your body and actions and what you do with your body and movements will have an effect on your mind. Therefore, think and practice rhythm and grace during all public speaking interactions.

Beyond these suggestions, another very powerful thing I can tell you about hands and hand gestures is that, while speaking, focus so much more on the message and the audience that you become less and less conscious of making hand gestures. Because we communicate as a single mind-body linked system, our hand movements, inadvertently, represent our thoughts and many a times fill in and make up for lack of appropriate words.

In all cases, always relax, have fun and let your message provide meaning and value to your listeners.

Raju Mandhyan
Author, Coach and Trainer
Video Clip
www.mandhyan.com

A World of Clear, Creative and Conscientious Thinkers!
http://mandhyan.blogspot.com/
http://www.youtube.com/user/RajuMandhyan

Need to Bleed

2009-10-29T21:05:00.001+08:00

Recently, in an interaction, with people from my profession, I got a bit peeved when someone began professing the value and importance of Corporate Social Responsibility as an image-building tool and as a marketing strategy. She was suggestiing that CSR practitioners pursue efforts in areas where it would give them higher exposure and visibility.

I was in a quiet rage for the next few days until I came by an article on the story Mayang. Mayang, a Filipina in Japan, who has been doing work for the community for years and not seeking recognition for it until it was gifted upon her.

Some of Mayang's words sit well with me and here they are, "...being successful is all about being humbled by the experience. Like palay [rice shoots] arches its body towards the ground when starting to bear grains," and "You put success in your heart, not in your head."

Read the whole article at ‘Bayaning Pilipino’ in Japan By Karlo Jose R. Pineda
Philippine Daily Inquirer
First Posted 08:30:00 10/26/2009

Creating Resonance

2009-10-29T14:42:00.002+08:00

Many a times in my workshops on interpersonal communications, sales, negotiations, etc; I have stressed the importance of aligning our internal resources like our mood, our state of mind and most importantly our authentic agenda behind the conversation. I have also stressed, referring to the 55+38+7 percentage rule of Dr. Albert Mehrebian, the importance of body language, tonality and gestures. The 55+38+7percentage rule on impact and effectiveness states that of a 100% impact upon our listeners, 7% comes from words, 35% from tonality and other non-verbals and 55% from our total presence and body language.

Now this is only partially understood by many and completely misinterpreted by many a trainer and coach of interpersonal communications. When Dr. Mehrebian, originally, conducted studies on communication patterns the results of the studies were widely circulated in the press, in abbreviated form, leading to blithe acceptance and generalization of the outputs. Dr. Mehrabian’s research was to decipher the relative impact of facial expressions and spoken words. His subjects were asked to listen to a recording of a voice saying the single word “maybe” in three tonalities, to convey liking, disliking and neutrality. The subjects were then shown pictures of the faces conveying the same three emotions. Then subjects were asked to guess the emotions portrayed by the recorded voice, the pictures and both combined. The subjects’ assessment of the picture+voice drew more accurate responses. In another study, subjects listened to nine recorded words, three meant to convey liking (honey, dear and thanks), three to convey neutrality (maybe, really and oh) and three to convey disliking (don’t, brute and terrible). The words were spoken with varying tonalities and subjects were asked to guess the emotions behind the spoken words. The finding was that tone created more impact and meaning than words alone.

Thus the 55+38+7 Rule was born and has been promoted around for years and decades across disciplines and other learning interaction. Years later, Dr. Mehrebian declared he never intended his results to be applied to everyday conversations and public speakers cannot just depend on 55+38% impact alone. The truth is that the spoken word has several intangible components and a flat out application or the assumption of this rule would be a fallacy. All interactions must equally depend on the three factors i.e. body, non-verbal and the words. The percentages of each my resemble the rule for 100% impact but in reality will vary upon depending on the medium and the context.

What true and heavy impact will really depend upon is the clarity, the purpose and the authentic agenda of the speaker. Through the filters of the body, the tonality, the gestures, the non-verbals and flowery language what are truly seen, heard and sensed well are the purpose and the agenda of the speaker. Getting an alignment and agreement between what we truly want, feel and need helps make the outward expression of it more viable, acceptable and impact heavy. Alignment of our internal resources_spititual, emotional, intellectual and physical is guaranteed to create resonance and consensus easily. View similar sentiments at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cfgToFYRfrM

Positive Intention

2009-10-29T14:25:00.003+08:00

Late one night, me and more than a dozen friends of mine from the coaching profession walked into a small coffee shop in Greenhills, Manila. All of us, ready for a jolt of caffeine, gathered up at the counter. The attendant, who seemed to be cleaning up the place, went aghast at the crowd in front of him and declared the shop was closed.

“Wow, what time do you close?” said fiery Susan, the wealth coach.
“Uh, 10:00pm, ma’am” replied the attendant.
“But, it’s only 9:55 now!” she said with an edge to her voice.
“Yes, ma’am but one of our rules is to close at exactly 10:00pm and I don’t think we will be able to achieve that and yet serve all of you” he replied.

Now here was a clash of goals and ideals. Should the man have focused on specific goals or think big picture and ring up additional pesos to his daily sales goals.
For the attendant to think big picture and to make a decision in light of the Coffee Company’s strategic intentions he’d have to be fed with a lot more meaningful information rather than just a few regiments against which his performance would be measured. He’d have to juggle his decision making between the six generic performance indicators that every business strategist leans upon, namely; competitive advantage, flexibility of action, financial performance, resource utilization, quality of service and innovation. He’d have to choose between being excellent with resource utilization and increasing the financial performance of his outlet.

Now, the thrust of Leadership Conversations is not so much about strategy and decision making but more towards providing quality feedback and coaching others. The thrust is towards eliciting, through conversations, leadership qualities out of self and others.

So, imagine, a month later, the attendant is sitting in front of you and you’ve got to talk him about the evening a dozen or more customers lined up in front of him five minutes before closing and the fact that he’d let them know that the outlet was closed. Here’s an NLP [ Neuro-Linguistic Programming] presupposition that you can utilize, “There is a positive intention motivating every behavior, and a context in which every behavior has value.”

You’ve got to realize that his choice at that moment was based completely on the knowledge he had of the issues involved in that scenario. The outcome of his decisions may or may not have been in alignment with the company’s overall strategy but his intentions were absolutely positive. You could then, through questioning and dialogue, upgrade his decision-making skills for the future. You’d have to start with the presupposition that behind his behavior was a positive intention and then work your way forward and upward. That would be your leadership in action through NLP.

That evening in Greenhills, Susan, the wealth coach, gently influenced the attendant into taking our orders. He failed at closing on time but succeeded at raising his financial performance for the day.

Appreciative Inquiry, an Acquaintance

2009-10-04T05:56:00.000+08:00

A Quick Video Clip

Individuals and organizations are similar in the way that like an individual an organization needs to be conceived, given birth, incubated, nurtured, formed, trained, inculcated with values and then released into the world to become fruitful and value-adding entities. Like individual, organizations too, come in all shapes, sizes and cultures. Some live long and some just fly by the night. Some succeed and excel continuously while others just chug along happily ever after. Both, individuals and organizations, can live to be quite simple systems or become increasingly complex for themselves and by their own making.

The challenge, though, we all face is how can we all constantly and continuously succeed, excel, stay at the top of our game, and yet keep on adding value to the communities, the country and the world that surrounds us. The current, though ancient in nature, approach is to look for and analyse what does not work in a system and then make an effort to fix it.

The approach is ancient because it rests on the belief that individuals and organizations have, or are problems by themselves and they need to be solved. The approach becomes inherently fallacious because it focuses upon what does not work rather than what is working well or what can work well. This failure focussed approach also evolves from our addiction to the cliché that a rotten apple spoils the basket and therefore we need to find that apple and do away with it. For a basket of apples that may conclude as a happily ever after but individuals and organizations are far from being just a plain, old basket of apples. We, as systems, can think, analyse, feel, judge, act, learn, help, celebrate and, more important than anything else, dream and design our own destinies.

Thus, the cliché of rotten apples and our belief in the cliché can be overturned with gusto and fervour. A basket of rotten apples, when it comes to humans and human organizations can turn fresh and can get nourished when a good apple is placed amongst us. A good thought, a good word, a good deed and a good human system can convert individuals and organizations into supportive, constructive, value-driven entities.

In the mid-90s, post the 1992 racial riots in Los Angeles, Erin Gruwell, an enthusiastic school teacher, takes up a job at Woodrow Wilson in Long Beach, California where she is placed plumb in the middle of a multiracial, hard to integrate, class of “at risk and highly unteachable, students.” Amidst the tension ridden surroundings, students are forced into class by security guards, Erin Gruwell works her way through the resistance and the angst of not just the students but a lethargic and numb educational system by focussing on the sparks of potentialities in the students, on what works and on the possibilities of the future. She works through by gently appealing to the human side of the individuals and the groups involved. In the process she makes multiple sacrifices for her career, her family and her status in the community but eventually efforts bear fruit when at the end of two years her bunch of students graduate and move on to college and a life ahead. A good, strong apple that nourishes and brightens the life of people around her.

Though she did not follow any set method or a frame-work to clean out a system that was rife with a culture of failure and resistance. She manages to help a bunch of multi-racial, unteachable, angst-ridden student and their families into happy, productive entities through sheer passion and grit. Thankfully, for us, who are into individual and organizational development there is a whole school of thought and practice which can deliver results at par with those of Teacher Erin Gruwell of Woodrow Wilson High School in California.

The method of Appreciative Inquiry, developed by Dr. David Cooperrider of Case Western University, provides an approach and a way towards achieving excellence by focussing on exceptional performances of the past and current core strengths which can be blended with a clear, challenging and conscientious vision of the future. The method is holistic, life-giving, constructive and in resonance with all that nourishes us as human beings and human organizations.

The approach draws from two modalities. First, Appreciation: an act of recognizing the best in people, places and performances and then to add and increase in value. Second, Inquiry: an act of exploration to discover potentials and highlight possibilities. The first leans on our needs to love and be loved, while the second rests on our natural desires to wonder and be curious about things. The combination of the two modalities creates a powerful potion to build, construct and energize areas and behaviours that are working well and boost their growth and development exponentially. Highly regarded as a paradigm for seeking out what works and moving towards it, a method for many organizational development practices, Appreciative Inquiry for many, is much more than that. It, in many circles, is regarded as a way of life and like life it needs to be soaked in appreciation and inquisitiveness of what is and what can be.

In contemporary methods, most all systems and organizations are seen as problems to be solved by management techniques such as root-cause analysis, solution analysis, critical problem-solving and mechanised action planning. With Appreciative Inquiry, organisations become a mystery to be embraced, a world to be created by reflecting on what we do best and by sharing life-giving narratives of success and harmony, by making inspired choices and designing a future of our dreams. This ‘way of life’ can pervade through research and planning, managing, mentoring and coaching for change. It can be lived through and for developing communities, invoking business excellence and creating visions and missions.

The most powerful tool of Appreciative Inquiry, or AI as it is referred to, is the AI Protocol or the inquiry process. This inquiry process invokes excellence and energy. It is achieved through powerful and structured questions which leave the responder empowered for idea generation, action planning and implementation. The questioning process is a tri-modal approach and is explored in depth after the discussion of the several assumptions the theory of AI makes for unleashing its effectiveness.

AI makes eight assumptions, and though they may have similarities with several other paradigms; they substantiate well the premise, the promise and the power behind the AI.

• Assumption One: In every human situation there is always something which works. No matter how damaged, destructed or dysfunctional a system is, there is and will always be a spark of life and humanity in it which can be rehabilitated. Our objective then, from that window, becomes to seek, to enhance and spur that spark into a flame.

• Assumption Two: It is important to value and appreciate differences. Differences exist and differences are a fact of life in not just what is but also in what is considered to be is. It behooves us to recognize and respect that realities and our perceptions can differ. We need to synergize and seek strength from the diversity.

• Assumption Three: What we focus upon becomes reality. Our intellect can, but our mind is unable to decipher simulation from reality. Should we then focus upon the constructive and our capability to succeed, then we get drawn towards building and achieving success.

• Assumption Four: Realities are created in the moment and there are, always, multiple realities. Since most realities are our perceptions of the truth and our perceptions constantly change with changing times, economics and environmental conditions. Therefore, realities are multiple and our current perceptions are realities of the moment.

• Assumption Five: The language we use shapes our realities. Since our current perceptions are the realities of the moment and our words are used to describe our perceptions then our words and how we string those words together morph and shape our oncoming realities.

• Assumption Six: The act of asking questions influences the outcome in some way. Not really in “some way,” but in a way that can be, if needed, measured and controlled. Questions, we ask, are our invitations to others to express the reality of their perceptions. Others respond with words and language to our invitations to share perceptions, the language they use shapes reality and therefore influences outcomes.

• Assumption Seven: People have more confidence going into the future [unknown] when they carry parts of the present [known.] Since perception and reality are divided by a very thin, almost invisible, wall, perceptions which are like real-life experiences or actual experiences then they give strength and vigour to developmental thoughts and actions towards designing a positive future towards success and excellence.

• Assumption Eight: When we carry the best parts of the past into the future, they will create a better future. Enough said.

These assumptions are the driving force and the armament behind the double-barrelled approach of appreciating and inquiring. That, perhaps, is not a highly recommendable metaphor for AI, since AI is all about the right choice of words and the subtle and powerful influence the structure of language has on our minds. Nevertheless it brings us right into the discussion of inquiring in depth the practice-able of how, the way of life that AI is, works.

The theory of AI has a very simple, framework to apply. It starts with choosing a topic, a theme or a developmental challenge. This is then followed by a four-stage process as follows:

• Discovery: In this stage the AI practitioner helps uncover past strengths and successes while staying anchored and focussed towards the central theme. In the Discovery stage allowing the respondent entity to express and share stories is the key objective followed by listening for “what gives life,” within those stories. These life-giving elements can be used to propel the dream and the destiny.

• Dream: In this stage, the practitioner invites the sharing of dreams and visions from the respondents. The process elevates hopes of achieving the ideals.

• Design: the design stage is critical since it needs to take account of external realities and material capabilities of the individuals and the organisations. This stage also calls for working out a result-based plan on how to achieve the dream.

• Deliver [Live the Destiny]: At this stage the practitioner helps the respondents visualize and simulate success of the design thereby imprinting, with power and passion, it as the reality on the minds of the respondent entities.

The critical step for these four stages is a proper selection of the core theme. The choice of words and the language structure needs to be empowering and affirmative from every angle.For example if a community development group chose, “Reduction of Crime and Graft in the Country,” then that theme, though logical, will have a negative tinge since it assumes the existence of crime and terror and may thus end up feeding that beast. The theme can be reworded to, “Nurturing Peace and Order in the Country.” This version assumes existence of peace and order, this shifting focus to what works for eventual development.

Therein lies the power of Appreciative Inquiry and the most consistent and handy tool for all these stages is the power of intelligent and empowering questioning, also referred to as the AI Protocol. The protocol is a process of questioning to empower the deliverance of dreams and destinies. Three powerful things happen when we ask the right questions.

• One. The questioning process raises a storm of curiosity and challenges all status quo. This, inadvertently, invites creative thought, followed by careful words and conscientious action.
• Two. Questioning helps converge thinking between the creative and the logical side. It also stirs up unconscious wisdom and challenges mindless rituals.
• Three, responses to questions make the responder an author of those ideas and, thus, drives them, eventually, into conscientious action.

All questions are made up of three elements.

• The first element of questioning well is the construction and the linguistic tilt of it. The format of the question can open up options or close possibilities.
• The second element of the question considers the capacity and the ability of the responder. It is this element of questioning which mostly draws response regarding the “how” of things.
• Finally, the third element regards and analyses all underlying assumptions. The higher the ratio of positive and appreciative assumptions a question has, the better a response it generates.

Under the AI Protocol there are three forms of questions. Levels, if you prefer.

• Inward Questions are those that make the responder reflect upon the how, the when and the why of past performances and past successes. These questions, through anecdotal responses, surface strengths and competencies of individuals and groups.
• Outward Questions string together innate strengths and successes to present day possibilities. These are questions related to the what, the when, the who, the where and the how of achievable plans.
• Forward Questions recreate and reinforce dreams and possibilities. These questions create stimulation and simulation of successes and celebrations in the mind. Forward Questions are future-paced. They give shape and form to visions thereby creating powerful and positive tension between what is and what can be.

The power of the AI Protocol is unsurmountable and the holistic core of the AI Way of Life brings to fore good living and greater business successes. AI raises our benchmarks and our bottom-line with ease and élan.

This November,2009, hundreds of AI Thought Leaders and Practitioners will converge in Kathmandu, Nepal for the

Annual Conference on Appreciative Inquiry. The conference will explore the factors that promote global health, peace and societal welfare. The outcome desired will be discovery of new ways AI can create sustainable peaceful and yet, vibrant communities. The truth that this conference will expose is that everything has beauty and, with the AI Way of Life, all eyes and hearts can capture it.

By Raju Mandhyan
www.mandhyan.com
http://www.linkedin.com/in/rajumandhyan

Raju, has over ten years’ experience in personal development, specifically in the areas of interpersonal relations, increased awareness, and communication skills. He specializes in helping others understand how to communicate thoughts, ideas, goals, and visions of the future. Thousands of executives across the Asian-Pacific region have benefited from Raju’s training and coaching.

He has been trained and certified in many modalities including but not limited to the following: Neuro Linguistic Programming, Mind Mapping, LIFO and Celemi. He is a trainer certified by the American Management Association and by the Arbinger Institute.

He has authored two books, one on Public Speaking and another on Humor as a tool for Leadership. His background is in international trade. He has lived and worked in three different cultures - Indian, Filipino, and American. Currently, he lives and works out of the Philippines.

Power of the Pause

2009-10-03T06:07:00.001+08:00

A work of art, way before it becomes a masterpiece, must start with a plain white canvass. Hidden, and yet unborn, inside it lie the ponderings, the passions and the promise of hope and beauty. The artist’s creativity would be severely crippled, every time he picked up his brush, if the solitude of white on the canvass did not lure him to conceive and co-create a brand new reality. Just like masterpieces require the emptiness of a canvass to creatively explode upon; our conversations also need momentary silences, pauses, to express and highlight the magic and motivation which lie hidden in our hearts and minds.

Job applicants, job interviewees, salespeople, managers and even senior executives across industries fall into this trap of speaking up without thinking in. We forget to recognize and give way to the feelings within. This constant shooting-from-the-hip-ness adds nothing but more noise to the din and the mindlessness that engulfs our world. This aimless and excessive thoughtless verbosity is a waste of ammunition and a massive waste of human energy.

A pause, before, during and even after conversations adds color, rhythm and a panoramic elegance to conversations. A pause, properly orchestrated, is one of the most powerful dynamics of speech. It allows the speaker and the listener to assess thoughts, structure ideas and tap into the deeper recesses of our wisdom and instinct. In the language of Neuro-Linguistic Programming, a pause allows us to align our internal resources of intellect, emotion and authentic self with our external resources of the body, speech and action.

In conversations, before interactions, we can chose to stop, to slow down and be still for a few seconds. This will allow us to put a leash on the chain-reaction of reactive behaviour. This can lessen our spinning off in the usual way of defend, offend, talk up, talk down and constantly justify our past performances. A pause is power and a pause induces empowerment and trust, as it makes the other person feel listened to. This little pause then becomes a source of powerful human energy.

The way to increase the amount of pausing before, during and after all our interactions is to keep a mindful awareness on our breathing. Every now then the din and the clamour of the world that surrounds us tends to take over and engulf us in its toxicity but an awareness on our breath acts as an anchor and helps us manage emotions. A visible sign, and constant life-saver of emotional intelligence is a smooth, deep and a rhythmic flow of breath.

In many of my workshops, I profess the 3P method of powerful connection, engagement and influence. In any interaction plant yourself in a position where you are physically stable, at ease and have good visibility and exposure. After planting, pause deeply to gather your thoughts and visualize empowerment of the listeners and a successful outcome of the conversation. Finally, project yourself with power and confidence keeping the goals of the interaction authentic, integral and driven by purpose. This will align your internal and external resources and also evoke excellence from others. That, in essence, is leadership and coaching for excellence in action.

Pausing consciously is a momentary respite between being completely self-absorbed to being awake and present for others and for life. Our conversations need these momentary silences and pauses, to express and high-light the magic and motivation which lie hidden in our hearts and minds.

Raju Mandhyan
Author, Coach and Trainer
Video Clip
www.mandhyan.com A World of Clear, Creative and Conscientious Thinkers!
http://mandhyan.blogspot.com/
http://www.youtube.com/user/RajuMandhyan

Original Knowledge and Intellectual Property

2009-08-30T13:03:00.001+08:00

The idea of original knowledge tied in with the concept of intellectual property does raise a lot of issues. The growth of knowledge has been like a raging fire and futurists claim that in the next decade or so everything we already will double. At the same there are others who want to, with good reason, like to protect the work they put out. I am off the bias that we should be careful and yet take failure to control things lightly. After all we still haven’t given credit to the person who put together the 26 letters of the alphabet and the person who came up with numbers.

Two of my speaker friends put out a query on Linked In and many others responded to their ponderings. I share here the questions and my thoughts on the subject.

Question from Karen Peña / Meeting Professional / Professional Speaker / Trainer / Motivator:

“Is it bad etiquette to reference and quote another speaker in your presentation? We all admire our peers in the industry. At times I would like to reference key points from their presentations, and give them the credit of course! Is that a big faux pas? “

Answer:

"The unexamined life is not worth living. " Socrates, Apology.

Now how many times has this been repeated, in variations, by writers and speakers over the centuries? Add to this the possibility that this quote, in itself, may have been a variation of something someone must have said before Socrates.
There is an inherent fallacy in the belief that something is totally original. Most everything I know I have learned from someone, somewhere and the process, prior to that, has been continuous. I, Ladies and Gentlemen, am nothing but a dung-heap of perceptions, which I claim to be my own! [Uh, wait! Didn't someone say something just like that before?]

The knowledge and the wisdom in one good book have similarities to the knowledge and the wisdom in another good book, even as these books may have been written thousands of years ago.

My stand is use words, ideas and suggestions by others. Give credit to the author everywhere you can and yet claim nothing to be your own unless the world credits it to you.

“To thine own-self be true; And it must follow, as the night the day. Thou can'st not then be false to any man.” Shakespeare-- Hamlet. Act I. Sc. 3

Question from Nishant Kasilbahtla, Speaker, Trainer and Memory Champ.

“How do you deal when one of your participants (in a talk) posts what all you taught in his / her blog? I was searching the internet and found a blog where almost all key ideas I discuss in my talk are posted by one enthusiastic blogger (in some cases verbatim). The funny thing is, he didn’t even bother to mention my name in the post. How do you deal with people like this? Your ideas,please?”

Answer:

Nishant, you might consider celebrating.

We are in the business of human development. We are in the business of helping others. We are in the business of learning, morphing and distributing knowledge and actionable knowledge. Knowledge that will eventually turn to wisdom. Wisdom to spirituality.

We are in the business of contribution to society and the world. We are out there speading the good word and then someone grabs it from you and runs.

What's he going to do? Spread it as his own? He, thus, has helped you spread the goodies. He is doing your job. Seek no retribution.

His intentions and his actions create his destiny. They do not change yours. That as you already know, is no secret, dude!

Epilogue:

The second query ended with a happy ending. Nishant, upon suggestion from Heather Hansen, emailed the blogger who went online and rewrote the blog and gave credit to the speaker/author.

Raju Mandhyan
www.mandhyan.com
A World of Clear, Creative and Conscientious Thinkers!

ThinSlicing Success

2009-08-30T07:38:00.000+08:00

Thin-Slicing Success

Several years ago my daughter, who was then nine years old, wanted to go wall climbing at a local mall. Though she’d never done this before, her Mom and I thought it was a great idea since we’d have something new to do during the weekend. So off we went to the Rockwell Mall. When we got to the wall my nine-year old quickly geared up for the 60foot wall climb. Once geared and strapped for safety, she eagerly rubbed powder on her hands and was off in a jiffy! Before, her Mom and I could say, “Go girl, go!” She was up at the top, and from the peak she turned around to see us applaud her. After she was done, I geared up and also heaved myself up and down the wall heavily.

The fun really kicked in when my daughter was hooked up, once again, for another go at the wall. This time, though, she pulled herself up a few notches on the wall and stayed there. Her Mom and I cheered, “Go girl, go!” But my daughter, she just stayed there. “C’mon you can do it, go, get to the top!” yelled her Mom. “Keep your eyes on the top and just go one step at a time,” I added. She didn’t move an inch! She screamed back saying she was happy where she was and that we should let her be. So there she stayed an arms length away from my reach, for the rest of our adventurous weekend together.

Fear, unfounded, had taken hold of her spirits and she would not budge an inch. Her past performance created no motivation for her and all she could do was to stay numb to all admonishments.

How many times do we, as individual and organizations find ourselves in the same circumstances? How many times do we, all external circumstances and internal resources staying the same, get locked into a state of inactivity and stagnancy? At the individual level this can be easily and directly related to fear and trauma. At the organizational level it is not that easy to pinpoint this lack of movement and growth to fear, but, yes, it is almost always a very similar cause.

Recognizing and isolating this malady requires insights and experience from the leaders and developers of that organization. Healing such a malady can be brought about by taking into account a Nuero Linguistic Programming principle which states that, “Anything can be accomplished if the task is broken down into small enough steps.” Any of our previous processes, accomplishments and successes when recorded and studied carefully can be replicated over time, given that all external circumstances and internal resources, such as people, products, processes, etc., remain the same.

The school of Nuero-Linguistic Programming [NLP] further stress that the reason we fail or stagnate is much more related to our state of mind and not as much to a state of external resources and circumstances. Ask someone to shoot a moving toy duck, and he can and will do it once, twice, thrice but beyond a certain number his sense of personal expectations will take a plunge. He may not get tired, the aero dynamics of the moment may not change, but the awesomeness of the thought of repeatedly succeeding will sabotage his confidence and faith in his own skills. He will then sink into fear and then failure.

It is a similar dynamism that occurred inside my daughter’s mind when she made her second attempt to climb that wall, and it is the same thing that happens to us when we get awed by having overcome a few too many hurdles towards growth and success in business. The idea is to thin slice and segregate our thoughts and actions, in success, in such a way that they can be objectively recorded and then duplicated upon call. This is what many massively successful individuals and organizations do time and time again. Thin-slicing success is looking at critically, segregating the elements, analyzing them objectively, and recording them for easy duplication.

For leaders who want to manage themselves better and also coach others into success, this is a powerful belief and a place to start any conversation with. Anything can be accomplished if the task is broken down into small enough steps.

Copyright: Raju Mandhyan / www.mandhyan.com
A World of Clear, Creative and Conscientious Thinkers!

Humor and Laughter

2009-06-29T11:12:00.000+08:00

“Humor,” according to Stephen Leacock, the guru on the theory of humor, “is the kindly contemplation of the incongruities of life and the artistic expression thereof.” In other words, humor is the positive description of our flaws and follies, and it is the artistic expression of the lopsidedness of life and living.

We laugh when the incongruities of life and living are emphasized and exaggerated. We also laugh when incongruities are created in our perceptions. Creating incongruities is also referred to as derailing the normal pattern of thought, and all techniques on humor and comedy depend solely on this ability. This ability to derail the normal pattern of thought is the fulcrum that essentially mobilizes fun and raises the levels of our happiness.

Consider a finely dressed man walking briskly down the street, being admired by onlookers. When, unfortunately, this man suddenly slips and falls, the crowd of onlookers can’t help but burst out in laughter. The suddenness and the surprise of the situation snap the pattern of logical thinking and the onlookers couldn’t help but laugh.

Now, consider something as simple as the following statement: I was wondering why the Frisbee was getting bigger and bigger, when all of a sudden, it hit me!

Let me repeat that again, slowly this time, and see if it makes you smile or chuckle at the vision your mind creates.

I was wondering why the Frisbee was getting bigger and bigger, when all of a sudden, it hit me!

Here is what happened: your mind was focused on the speaker wondering about the looming Frisbee when the word “hit” tripped your thoughts, as did the vision of someone suddenly being hit by the toy—one that the speaker actually saw coming—and that triggered your smile or your laughter.

This trip, this incongruity, produces amusement because our brain is programmed to follow logic, structure, and sequence. When the sequence is broken or the structure is tripped, a result like a mental knee jerk is generated in the brain. This mental knee jerk sends a signal to the abdomen, which, in response, releases air into and through our lungs, larynx, and vocal chords, producing chuckles, guffaws and laughter.

Laugher, thus, is the outcome of humor. Laughter is the physical manifestation of humor, while humor is the sense and skill of creating laughter. Learning to laugh is learning to develop a sense of humor, and mastering the skills of humor requires observing, contemplating, and artistically expressing the flaws, follies, and the lopsidedness of life. Laughter is one of the main reasons why life still remains popular even though the cost of living goes up everyday.

John F. Hennedy was right ...

“There are three things which are real:
God, human folly, and laughter.
The first two are beyond our comprehension.
So we must do what we can with the third.”

Leadership Conversations

2009-06-23T14:49:00.000+08:00

Over the decades, the idea of Leadership has been made out to be like a huge, ambiguous and an incomprehensible thing. People go about making assessment about how grand, how perfect and how very important leadership is but the million-dollar truth is that leadership does, and can, always happens in tiny instances and tiny interactions we call “conversations.”

All of our grandest achievements, every life-changing incident, in reality, pop out from the wellspring of our beings as an idea, a thought or as an emotion. At the root level it is like an abstract seed that has to take form, which has to be substantiated, structured and styled in a way to be accepted by the world outside of our beings. This process requires generating, sorting, challenging and then simplifying it to be presented in a written or a spoken form—conversations!

I am firm believer of the fact that every word we express creates change, however minuscule, but it definitely and surely creates change. And, the kind of change our words create is a secondary question. A story that blurs through my mind is that of a father who hands his young son a bunch of nails and asks him to go and hammer the nails in the trunk of a large tree in their backyard. The son, without asking for any reasons from his Dad, does just that. A week later, the father instructs the son, again, to go out into the backyard and pull the nails out from tree-truck. This time, the son obeys but comes back curious and annoyed at having labored purposelessly when the father explains, “Son, our words are like the nails you hammered into that tree. When used for a purpose they can build and when used senselessly they can, like the scars left in the tree-trunk, create permanent damage.

Now, I take back the word “minuscule.” Every word we express, gives a new direction to who we are, what we want to become and how we want to influence people and the processes that surround us. So, as when an idea, a thought or an emotion pops up from the wellspring of our minds and intellect, it would behoove us let that idea or emotions pass through severe, internal, quality control. Ask yourself, if the thought your expressing has ethical groundings. Check if it will do justice to a positive, constructive purpose for all those it addresses. Verify and future-pace the long-term output it will create and then finally, with utmost care, express it with a willingness to learn from it and openness towards the feedback and the results it generates. That is leadership conversations in a nutshell.

Raju Mandhyan
Author, Coach and Trainer
www.mandhyan.com

How to Mind Map

2009-06-15T15:14:00.000+08:00

Mind Mapping® is a fun and simple technique that can help you analyze more efficiently and boost your creativity in expressing ideas. Originated by creativity expert Tony Buzan, Mind Mapping® has done wonders for my learning, thinking, and speaking skills.

I came upon this technique several years ago while I was conducting a presentation skills workshop for the British Council in Manila. A young Englishwoman with bright eyes and an easy smile sat through my workshop and seemed to do very little except keep her eyes on me. She seemed to be listening to every word I spoke with an uncanny ease.

At first, I thought she was bored. Then I thought that perhaps she didn’t like what she was hearing or probably knew much more than I did. It was intimidating and scary. Curious, I walked up to her and expressed my concerns. She smiled, held up the Mind
Map® book and her notes in a Mind Map® form. Later in the session, she shared with us the rationale and the benefits of the technique. I went home that night and did some research, called up some friends, and was intrigued enough to spend days and weeks learning more about it. In a matter of weeks I started applying the technique and soon became addicted. It worked fabulously!

Today, I apply it for reading, researching, writing, during meetings, and for public speaking. This is how I define Mind Mapping®: a colorful, two dimensional, quick representations of your ideas, knowledge, and feelings.

The rationale behind Mind Mapping® is that our senses take in a lot of information, and all this input generates responses, ideas, and opinions that cannot be expressed vocally or written down as quickly as they occur. For example, if 10 ideas flash through our minds then we may only be able to express only half of them verbally and less than a quarter in writing. Mind Mapping® provides the answer to this malady: It is like a thought-grabber with eight or ten sets of limbs. Capturing your thoughts quickly gives you time to analyze and qualify them later. This makes your thinking process more effective. Putting down thoughts in images and colors also enhances retention and invites the creative, right side of your brain to come and play!

How to create a Mind Map®

• Draw an image of your topic using three colors at the center of the paper positioned horizontally.
• Make the central image a representation of the topic. Use images rather than words.
• Draw the main, appealing ideas as thick branches coming from the central image.
• Whenever possible, use different color themes for different branches. This will help you segregate and qualify ideas later.
• Maintain one word per branch and keep that word on top of the branch.
• Add images wherever you can instead of words.
• Add arrows between images and branches and ideas expressing relationships or commonalities among the ideas.
• Flow with abandon. Do not judge your thoughts. Grab your ideas first and quantify them later.
• Use capital letters, print, and be creative with your Mind Maps®.

Reading a Mind Map®

A Mind Map® is drawn from the center going outwards and read from the outside going inwards. The primary branches form the main points and the secondary and tertiary branches form the sub-headings or points. The branch and its sub-branches are read flexibly. Read clockwise and then convert single words into simple sentences as you go. Structure, sequence, and polishing off the language in the complete text can be done later.

Benefits of Mind Mapping®

• Noting and reading only relevant words save time.
• Reviewing is graphical and can be done at a glance.
• Concentration on real issues is enhanced.
• Key words are easily discernible since they are placed according to importance for easier recall.
• Clear and appropriate associations are made between key words.
• The brain finds it easier to accept and remember the visually stimulating, multi-colored, multi-dimensional Mind Maps® rather than monotonous, boring linear notes.
• While Mind Mapping®, one is constantly on the verge of new realizations; this encourages a continuous and potentially endless flow of thought.
• The Mind Map® works in harmony with the brain’s natural desire for completion or wholeness.
• By constantly utilizing both the logical left and the creative right side of the brain, the mind becomes increasingly alert and receptive.

Over the years, as an ardent “Mind-Mapper,” I have come to realize that Mind-Mapping my ideas and emotions helps me look at them through a deeper, more colorful perspective.

Mind-Mapping my ideas and letting them percolate for a while allows my subconscious to kick-in and gently delete what is unnecessary, enhance and internalize what is useful and good. The process also increases my faith in the value of the material and confidence in my own self.

welcome to a world of clear, creative and conscientious thinkers

2009-06-14T07:58:00.000+08:00

A World of Clear, Creative and Conscientious Thinkers!

I can’t do anything … unless I Mind Map it out!

Yes, you guessed it … I am now hooked onto the idea of getting one’s thoughts down on paper by “mapping it out”, like an architect would do through a blueprint of their design project.

Buzan Licensed Instructor and Coach, Raju Mandhyan, who conducted the 2-day workshop, defined Mind Mapping as a “2-D refection of your own thoughts, ideas and feelings quickly transcribed on paper through images, colors, lines, and key words”.

Brainstorming, planning, writing articles and designing curriculum is a happy cinch with Mind Mapping. Mandhyan, whose Indian last name incidentally translates into Mind and Awareness, made the learning fun, interactive and practice-able. All I had to do as a student was to be there and “absorb like a sponge.” Absorb, I did! It has been almost 6 years since I was first introduced to Mind Mapping … and I have SO made the most of this “gift” Mandhyan extended to me.

For me, this “tool” / technique has certainly:

· helped me get MORE organized
· be MORE analytical with the tasks, projects I handle at a given time
· kept me MORE intact … especially where meetings, appointments or schedules are concerned
· allowed me to showcase a level of commitment, quality and creativity, too

That one significant day of October 3, 2001 at The Peninsula, Manila … was definitely NOT a coincidence.

With Mind Mapping, I was able to identify programs for the IT training courses I was assigned to market. This paved the way to formulate the appropriate marketing collaterals to the target market of the company.

With Mind Mapping, I received a grade of 98% for the project in my Events Coordination course. Using Mind Mapping, I feel like a creative genius and I am now working on projects, arts, literature and I am also managing and running my own consultancy in a most innovative manner.

Those who got to meet and network with Mandhyan’s Guru, Tony Buzan, last March at the Mandarin, Makati City claim that it was one of the best training events the country has experienced in years. I bet all those who walked out of that interaction will become Mind Map aficionados like me. Well let me, then, welcome you into a world of clear, creative and conscientious thinkers.

Ana Marie G. Herrera (March 29, 2007)
Consultant – Events: IT, eMarketing, Project Management

get rid of the anger that lurks

2009-06-06T16:09:00.000+08:00

I am turning another year next week. Way back when I was a kid, I didn't know that
I'd make it this far and still be healthy and hearty. I used to, then, think that
Forty was way too old. Your skin begins to sag, your chin and waistline grow folds,
your teeth begin to rot and the hair from your scalp moves down to your ears and
into your nose. Its downhill all the way and its bad!

That's what I used to believe then. Now, I am looking at Eighty in the same way.
Times change and so do our views. And, the reason this is on the top of my mind
today is because I happened to read Professor Randy Pausch's book, The Last Lecture,
a week ago.

Here's a bit about the book from his website, "A lot of professors give talks titled
"The Last Lecture." Professors are asked to consider their demise and to ruminate
on what matters most to them. And while they speak, audiences can't help but mull
the same question: What wisdom would we impart to the world if we knew it was our
last chance? If we had to vanish tomorrow, what would we want as our legacy? "
What if this was my last "Insights"? What would I say? What comes to my mind is
something my mother said several months before she did the world adieu. "Of all
the things that I should have done, I should have done away with the anger that
lurked inside of me for a large part of my life."

Though this is not my last Insights, I think, today, I'd like to make claim to the
statement that we should do away with the pain, we think, has been caused to us
by others. That will get rid of the anger that lurks and the fear that accompanies
that anger. The rest of our lives can then become what we alwsy dream of. Amen!

Raju Mandhyan
Author, Coach, Trainer
www.mandhyan.com

Insights On Insights

2009-05-15T15:08:00.000+08:00

The world does move at a maddening pace and I'd like to adhere to the adage that life is not just about adding speed to it. So when the rest of the word is up and tweetering, I decided to get on the blogging bandwagon. Here's my first song, hope you like it.

It is kinda' strange that nowadays everyone is out putting out something onto the cyberworld. Everyone is out there, busy, making a guru-of-sorts of himself. And, yes, of course, that list does include me. So, to set the pace and to get you all, hopefully, on my page I wanna' tell you what Insights is going to all about.

I am of the belief that everything changes all the time, consistently and constantly. We create the change, we are created by the change and we are affected by the change. It is a, forgive me, but a crazy, riotious, almost incomprehensible cycle of madness and mayhem. A cycle of time, space, elements, energy and emotions that is unstopping, unforgiving and has been around for for eons and eons. What each eon, each age and every individual does is to take an ever-so-tiny snapshot of this humongous change and present it all those around like a proud Dad showing off pictures of his newborn to his friends. What the Dad does forget it that world has seen ziliions of babies like his own before. And, that is quite alright given our limited worldview which is clamped between our perspectives of time and space.

So, that is what Insights is going to be all about_a tiny little snapshot through my personal camera. The lenses of my camera are named Clear Communication Skills, Creative Thinking and Conscientious Leadership. Compound all these together and measure the size of my worldview and you have the words "Change" and "Insights."